The endless silence..
Still awake at 1.20 in the morning again, having a full on break down after a mini binge, chocolates and biscuits and I had kept dinner down too, the feelings are killing me, they are breaking me. I know "I have a whole life ahead of me and this is going to be a great year for me" but that still doesn't help with the feelings. I feel like I could crawl in a ball and just stay there for days upon end until someone eventually forces me to move somewhere. But it feels like I now HAVE to finish this uni course, I know its only 2 more weeks, but I'm struggling to even make it to tomorrow. I can't be a let down to people anymore though, I've already done enough of that. So I keep quiet, and never let them hear a peep.. My Heart is breaking from all of this pain. :'(
Replies
It may feel awful but the fact is you are doing better, just feeling worse. You will make it through because you are strong and you have proven that in the past. I am sorry that you are in pain. :( but we are all here to support you. I believe in you. I wish I could take all your pain. Pat yourself on the back and try to keep going.
Oh honey I\'m so so.sorry. I know how you feel trust me. I feel your pain I\'m right there with you. Just keep trying ok? You can do it. I have faith.in YOU! Please don\'t be so hard on yourself ok? Just know that you made a mistake and resolve to do better next time. Take Care and God Bless ((((( hugs))))))
Thank you beth and rexory. I\'m going to keep trying though its as hard as anything. I am going to the psychologist finally tomorrow, I am really hoping it helps. Though I guess one session isn\'t going to just dramatically make everything better, but anyway.. :/ Thanks