The 300 Pound Gorilla
There is something I encounter frequently on MS related sites. It is a very common complaint. Quite a few people complain that they are treated differently, as outcasts, as though there is something wrong with them. I never experience this, It has been going on for so long that I have given it much thought.
I believe I have arrived at the answer. Think of the old joke, "Where does the 300 pound gorilla sit ?"
"Wherever he wants to."
What I am getting at is that I attribute my being treated differently than many MSers simply due to size. No doubt there is an unintended intimidation factor involved. I am 6' 2" (190.5cm) and weigh over 250 lbs (113,4kg). I must asume that I never get "those looks" when I use a public scooter, or sit in the disabled reserved area, because of the joke I referenced above. I sit wherever I want.
And of course it cannot be discounted that I simply do not see any looks cast my way. I genuinely do not care what people think. I have been with friends who have pointed out looks that I garner, often I do not see them, even if they are pointed out.
Just recently I read a quote form someone here at DS. I really really like it.
"Dr. Seuss quote...'those that mind don't matter, those that matter don't mind' "
My daily tilting with the MonSter takes up enough of my time. Jousting with the ignorant simply isn't worth the effort.
I realize that very few MSers share my stature, but all of them can adopt my perspective. Over 25 years ago I met a man. We became friends, One day I noticed something about him. When I pointed it out at first he was insulted, But as we talked, he came to see my point. He was very short, at least a foot shorter than me. I had seriously never noticed it ! Everyone respected him. His deportment was one of supreme self-confidence. I simple had never noticed his stature before, and once I had, it made absolutely no difference.
I believe I have arrived at the answer. Think of the old joke, "Where does the 300 pound gorilla sit ?"
"Wherever he wants to."
What I am getting at is that I attribute my being treated differently than many MSers simply due to size. No doubt there is an unintended intimidation factor involved. I am 6' 2" (190.5cm) and weigh over 250 lbs (113,4kg). I must asume that I never get "those looks" when I use a public scooter, or sit in the disabled reserved area, because of the joke I referenced above. I sit wherever I want.
And of course it cannot be discounted that I simply do not see any looks cast my way. I genuinely do not care what people think. I have been with friends who have pointed out looks that I garner, often I do not see them, even if they are pointed out.
Just recently I read a quote form someone here at DS. I really really like it.
"Dr. Seuss quote...'those that mind don't matter, those that matter don't mind' "
My daily tilting with the MonSter takes up enough of my time. Jousting with the ignorant simply isn't worth the effort.
I realize that very few MSers share my stature, but all of them can adopt my perspective. Over 25 years ago I met a man. We became friends, One day I noticed something about him. When I pointed it out at first he was insulted, But as we talked, he came to see my point. He was very short, at least a foot shorter than me. I had seriously never noticed it ! Everyone respected him. His deportment was one of supreme self-confidence. I simple had never noticed his stature before, and once I had, it made absolutely no difference.
Replies
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don\'t matter & those who matter don\'t mind.
Dr. Suess
This hangs on refridgerator and I have it on a laminated index card in our bedroom. I truely believe it. I\'m almost to the point where I DONT care what other ppl think. A few I still do, that is a very short list and is mainly immediate family. (Husband, my children and my super supportive best friend, who ironically is an R.N.)
I have been treated very differently since my DX, by ppl we thought (emphasis here) were friends. One was even so insensitive to walk up to me after not seeing us for about 4 months telling me how she was so excited to see me doing well, as she thought for sure I\'d be all withered up in a wheelchair upon arrival. Others just try to do everything for me, which I HATE! I\'m not dead, not physically handicapped, perhaps a bit mentally unstable (LOL~ as if I wasn\'t already to some twisted extent LMAO) but I\'m fine. I work a full time job chacing mentally and physically handicapped kids in a classroom all day for heavens sake! A job noone wants and everyone thinks Im nuts for doing.
I enjoy your posts and thoughts... keep them coming!