Thanking God for my blessings!
The last few weeks have been crazy. A friend of mine from work passed away from cancer. Also a 16 year old cousin died of leukemia only 1 1/2 weeks after being diagnosed! It was SO heartbreaking! These events just shook me to my core to get me to sit here and try to remember that life is short and to remember what is important in life!
Work has been crazy busy and I have been putting in some OT. I have had my moments where I had to remind myself to breathe as I get stressed and upset, but I am OK. Now just gotta push myself to get a little more motivated. Thinking of cutting my 10mg Lexapro in 1/2 for a while and see what happens. I get so dog tired and wondering if it is the Lexapro. Sometimes hard to focus. Also, still getting those warm/hot feelings with tingly all over and "waves" all over which I am thinking are hot flashes and used to be precursers to anxiety/panic attacks.
Since the bad panic attacks last summer, I gave up smoking and also gave up on my big love of reading, especially on my Kindle. Well, these last few weeks I have started reading again and as part of "what is important in life" search, remember how much I enjoyed reading.
Exercise has not been great and I am BIG TIME emotional eating, and it is comfort food and I have gained yet another couple of lbs. I have occasionally felt like "I gotta have a cigarette" which has freaked me out some. Not a physical need, but a psychological one. So I turn to food. This is something I have to work on this week and get myself back on track!
Today was a good day. My mom came over for dinner and brought Max. She brought my favorite, strawberry shortcake (tomorrow is my birthday.) She got a Gentle Leader collar. I fit Max with it. He fought me for 10 mins but after that, he was PERFECT on the leash! Loose lead! My mom got almost choked up! This one thing made such a huge difference in her getting him under control. so I made her walk with me to train her how to use it. He now walks better than Kona! He learned this in 10 mins what took me weeks to train Kona to do. So I think my mom feels better and more hopeful with Max. So I got in two good walks with my mom and Kona and Max!
I feel horrible as a friend since I have not been here for you guys or kept up with journals. Please bear with me. I will try to get caught up with everyone this week! I love you guys! I have been thinking of you all. I would be nuts without my DS friends! I appreciate all of your hugs and support!
Work has been crazy busy and I have been putting in some OT. I have had my moments where I had to remind myself to breathe as I get stressed and upset, but I am OK. Now just gotta push myself to get a little more motivated. Thinking of cutting my 10mg Lexapro in 1/2 for a while and see what happens. I get so dog tired and wondering if it is the Lexapro. Sometimes hard to focus. Also, still getting those warm/hot feelings with tingly all over and "waves" all over which I am thinking are hot flashes and used to be precursers to anxiety/panic attacks.
Since the bad panic attacks last summer, I gave up smoking and also gave up on my big love of reading, especially on my Kindle. Well, these last few weeks I have started reading again and as part of "what is important in life" search, remember how much I enjoyed reading.
Exercise has not been great and I am BIG TIME emotional eating, and it is comfort food and I have gained yet another couple of lbs. I have occasionally felt like "I gotta have a cigarette" which has freaked me out some. Not a physical need, but a psychological one. So I turn to food. This is something I have to work on this week and get myself back on track!
Today was a good day. My mom came over for dinner and brought Max. She brought my favorite, strawberry shortcake (tomorrow is my birthday.) She got a Gentle Leader collar. I fit Max with it. He fought me for 10 mins but after that, he was PERFECT on the leash! Loose lead! My mom got almost choked up! This one thing made such a huge difference in her getting him under control. so I made her walk with me to train her how to use it. He now walks better than Kona! He learned this in 10 mins what took me weeks to train Kona to do. So I think my mom feels better and more hopeful with Max. So I got in two good walks with my mom and Kona and Max!
I feel horrible as a friend since I have not been here for you guys or kept up with journals. Please bear with me. I will try to get caught up with everyone this week! I love you guys! I have been thinking of you all. I would be nuts without my DS friends! I appreciate all of your hugs and support!
Replies
I feel horrible too, work has prevented me from commenting. I am so sorry about your co-worker and cousin, that is so heartbreaking!!!!! I hate to hear stories like this. :(. Don\'t worry about the emotional eating you have a partner in crime right here. Xoxo- Jen
Sorry to hear about your cousin and co worker my condolences.
It\'s great that you were able to get the lead for Max. Now your mom can have her companion.
Don\'t worry about not being on for a bit. You\'ve been threw so much. Take care ...
I wish you the best.
Glad you checked in (((hugs)))
Do what you have to do to make you life good and if that means too busy to visit here with us than that is good too.
The only way exercise works for me in the long term is if I set this one fast rule:
No exercise = NO FOOD
I love food so much it works every time I apply this rule. I would probably attempt mountain climbing if I thought that was the only way to get to the cheesecake!! LOL
My fat loves my body and does not want to go anywhere else - but my love of food can only be indulged in once I do three 15 min. sets on the treadmill with two sets of lifting 2 lb weights five reps each. Very, very simple and all I can do right now but the weight is coming off and I ENJOY my eating guilt free!!!
Hang in and work at the best life possible - we have to believe we are WORTH IT!!! And we ARE!!!!
((hugs)) Patricia
Happy Birthday!
I wish I would have know about the Gentle Leader when we had our dog...we might still have him. Super that it worked so well and so quick! Amazing!
Do not beat yourself up for not being able to get to DS very often...life gets in the way.
I agree - life gets in the way and getting to DS gets tricky. Glad you popped in a few times lately with hugs and journals - always nice to hear from you :) Honestly, I\'d rather see you turn to food than cigarettes. Eventually you\'ll get to the point where you turn to something like reading or walking or music or exercise for emotional support. No worries. As long as we\'re cognizant and aware of where we are at, we can work toward the goals we set and we aren\'t burying our heads in the sand. It really all does come together as long we don\'t give up completely. And we\'re not! We\'re in this together. Love ya!