Terrible Situation

I haven't written in awhile, but have a lot to say, and I do know you all will help me. I started a new job Monday last week, and I am already being forced to quit before I get fired.  Everyone I work with minimizes my bosses actions, but to me they are a crime.  Here is what happened to me the last two days.  Please feel free to write back and encourage me because I really need it. Thursday before I left work, I was talking to my Secretary, and my boss gave me the cold shoulder and walked away.  I didn't think much of it until the next day and following. Friday I went to work with much excitement as usual, but had a day that was the worse I have had in a long time.  About 9:30 a.m., my boss called me into her office, and I didn't think much of it.  Here is what she said and did that was unprofessional and verbally abusive.  "I'm going to cut your hours.  The last two days you were reading on the job, and if you keep that up our company will go bankrupt.  You are not productive and are not being kept busy.  You have to be here busy, and not are here to sit around and do nothing for two days.  You have one week, but until then you are to impress and please me.  You are to give me your schedule and keep me current on it, and go out into the community to market.  You need to go to places besides funeral homes.  You can't do any of this, your hours will be reduced." During that time she was yelling at me, and putting me down.  Here is what I said to her, "Why?  I can read and research it is in the job description.  Yeah.  Okay.  Funeral Homes..."  This was about all I said. I came back to her an hour later after crying for a very long time and calmed down, and confronted her on how I felt.  I said, "I am a quiet person, and express my passion in other ways.  I need you to communicate to me what you want, listen to me, not yell at me, and observe me.  I want to get to know you, so I can do a better job at my work.  I have done flyers, brochures, etc.  (I even showed her the list of where I would go.  I have gone above and beyond what you have asked.  I can read and research on the job because it is in the job description.  (Showed her what I have done on it with the hard copy).  I also said on my occassions, "I did not say that..." She again yelled at me and put me down again.  She said, "You cannot read and research on the job.  I have nurses here who don't get paid to do continuing education, but you cannot do that here.  You are to read and research outside of work.  You are to tell me your schedule and communicate to me what you are doing.  You are to be passionate, and I am having my doubts about you and this position on whether or not you can do it.  If you are passionate, then you cannot do this job.  I don't see passion in you.  You have one week to prove yourself.  You don't appreciate me.  You don't care about your job.  You are incompetent and not capable of doing this job.  (Up to four or five times whilel lauging she said, "I can't work with you, or you are going to have to look for another job."       I too cried from that as well. I went to the staff meeting with everyone in the Hospice department, and she was passive agressive.  She would mainly look at the Social Worker, but not me.  She said to everyone and humilliated me by saying, "I am not comfortable with Elizabeth right now.  We also need to set up a meeting with Greg to see if this packet she came up with is appropriate or innapropriate."  She said this at least 2-3 times.  I was hurt. About 5 minutes later, with her passive agressiveness she was telling and yelling at me through the Social Worker what she expected of me.  I was hurt again. I talked to my husband, and we both concluded that she was verbally abusive towards me, and her expectations are unrealistic.  She wants to fire me by the end of next week more likely than anything at this point because I cannot get 5 people in to a support group in 5 days as well as get it done in a week.  Marketing also can take up to 6 months to get people in, but a week is not doable.  The task she has for me is impossible, and I cannot complete it.  I have no choice but to quit. Today I did turn her in for verbal abuse to the police.  Now I am awaiting to hear from them.  Monday afternoon I am getting my stuff out of there, and hopefully will hear something from another business soon.  Please be in prayer.  

Replies

JennS
JennS

If there is somebody above her, go talk to them. Sounds like she has personal issues and is making you the scapegoat. Don\'t quit. If she does fire you, you can look for work while collecting unemployment. You can also file a complaint for wrongful termination.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Im sorry you\'ve had such a bad day at work. I hope everything works out for the best. ill be praying for you.
BeckyK
BeckyK

I am so sorry honey. You don\'t deserve to be treated like that. I would quit, Don\'t put up with that abuse. Hugs honey.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Sorry to hear about what you are going through. I know the feeling. The things she is asking for IS impossible.

I applaud you for turning her in for verbal abuse. I wish I would have done that to my former boss. So, good for you.

As for what to do next...well, I would get out of there as soon as possible. In the meantime, you can see what you can do to let management know what is going on so that others won\'t have to suffer as well.

Good luck to you. You\'ll be in my prayers.
deleted_user
deleted_user

oh o can relate and i would go above her, i don\'t think police can help.n but see, maybe they will. Someone who is abusive usually does it to others, perhaps you need support of co-workers. If need be, maybe eventually you will look for new and better job or working environment.
tipperspal
tipperspal

Hey girl, I have been noticing your red face, but didn\'t really know what was going on with your life.
I have dealth with her type many times in my life. These type of people have no inkling of how to talk to their employees. She has no talent whatsoever in evaluation. Actually she sounds like a mean person. I had one like that on my last job and I cried and cried.It\'s one of life\'s lessons. Some people are just mean.
You sound like an intelligent person and you are well educated. You don\'t have to put up with this. There are other jobs that can use your talent. You are also grown and another grown person shouldn\'t talk to you like that. Shame on her!
I will read your journal again and see try to figure this all out.
I am sorry she hurt you. She had no right.
What goes around comes around and it will bite her in the a-- one day:-) Good luck to you, God Bless, and keep us posted.
Love, Judy
mayday101
mayday101

I\'m sorry that you are having to work for this woman, I don\'t know quite what to suggest, work place bullying can be quite baffling, ideally i would say the same as the others that you shouldn,t have to quit because of somebody elses behaviour but you need to look after your well being first so if it is too unpleasnt for you working there then i understand you wanting to quit, let us know how you get on,
L
deleted_user
deleted_user

Oh sweetie, I believe that you did the RIGHT thing in turning her into the police..that is just NOT right at all for her to treat you that way. That is a very passive aggressive way to look at things, and I cannot believe that she would call you out in front of EVERYONE in the department....I cannot BELIEVE some of the people that they make into bosses these days...do they not research them?!?!!? I have no clue....

Does your company not know anything about EMPLOYEE CONFIDENTIALITY?!? That what happens at work stays between you and the boss and that\'s it?!?! I think this is absolutely ridiculous, and I am so damn sorry that you had to go through this!!!! She is a very, very rude person, and I hope that she gets fired eventually for being so very unprofessional to her employees.

I am very saddened to hear what this woman has put you through...that is NOT right at all. You did the RIGHT thing...don\'t ever doubt that you did something wrong or inappropriate for a job, nonetheless. I am so GLAD that you stood up for yourself to her , because I know a lot of people who cannot do that.

Your strength is to be admired by others....I am blessed to be apart of your life, and have your friendship.

Please keep us updated on what the police says, as well as when you go get your stuff out of the office...hopefully, your boss will NOT have anymore confrontations....this woman has serious issues that NEED to be addressed.

I am here for you sweetie. Please keep us all updated.

Love you lots,

Brooklynmarie
deleted_user
deleted_user

I\'m sorry,I know how u feel,I think to because everything is getting so much harder people have a short wire.I work in retail and am often verbally abused through no fault of my own.Ther are too many stresses for people to cope with.
shea
shea

I am so sorry this has happen to you.This woman should never talk to you like that.I agree with what everyone else is saying.You deserve better than this.I would go over her head,if it would help,but i have run into the buddy thing myseft.I would file a complaint on her with her bosses and then look for another job.Or wait til she fired me and draw my money til i found a better job.I pray she will noot give you a bad report to anohter company,thats why i would write up a report on how she has treated you while you worked for her.She sounds like a jealous person,to me.I will have you in my prayers sweetie and know that God will take care of you and everyone else too.love ya,shea............
deleted_user
deleted_user

hope u find a better job
deleted_user
deleted_user

Elizabeth - I\'m so sorry this woman has been so awful to you. I think she is just a big verbally abusive bully that has probably gotten away with it over and over again. I think you did the right thing by reporting her. Maybe for once she will have to answer for her actions! She has no right to treat you or anyone else in such a terrible manner. I would say you need to find out who is in charge of your state\'s Department of Labor, contact them and file a report there as well. Who knows, maybe nothing really will come of it but then she is at least exposed! Hang in there...this was not the place God intended you to be....just a stepping stone until you find the right place! Hugs, Angel
jajaju
jajaju

I am so sorry this happened to you. God will give you the strength to go through all of this and He is always there carrying you through everything. Keep standing your ground and remember that you are grounded in Christ. I wish you all the best. Keep in touch and let me know how you are. I care about you.
deleted_user
deleted_user

I`m really sorry to hear all this.It seems as though she has her mind made up all ready,and giving you a unrealistic task is enforceing that.I think that it`s best that you look for work elsewhere,as nobody needs that kind of stress.God bless ,and good luck on future ventures,as im sure you will find better.
deleted_user
deleted_user

I am so sorry to read this. It is horrible how people in \"power\" feel that they can treat others any way they wish. I am so glad that you turned her in, and she certainly deserved it. Her expectations were way too high and the way she spoke to you and yelled at you was very unprofessional. There are other places that will appreciate all that you have to offer and won\'t humiliate you and abuse you. Sending hugs and prayers to you......Teresa