Temptation

Usually by now Jake would be sending me something in an email or calling my phone leaving me messages and I haven't heard any from him and its almost tempting to want to send him something or call him. But instead I decided to get on here. I mean it hasn't been that long last time he sent me something was Tuesday but he usually never goes a day without saying something to me. I'm not sure why I even care if he does or not. Its weird I don't want to talk to him but I want to be in his business. I need to quit, everytime I Talk to him it just pisses me off so I know that I shouldn't so I'm not going to. i like my life without him so why do I sometimes feel like he should still be in it? I hope this feeling goes away, it doesn't hurt but it doesn't feel good either. It's like anxiety. I had a long day at work today, this is the only place I feel comfortable with telling people about my situation. It's sick how I feel sometimes but I need to quit trying to be tempted.. I want him to leave me alone but I want him to pay attention to me? whats that called? Can someone give me some answers here..?Goodnight <3