Taking the next step.

Today started out with me feeling very gloomy. I could blame it on the lack of sunlight and the cold weather, but I know that would be avoiding what I know is wrong. At work, I wanted to go home because between my PMS and my trauma past I felt like crying. Sigh.
I came home feeling like I wanted to just lay in bed. To avoid this, I tried watching self-help videos, eating, prayer and cleaning. But I could not shake this dread I feel. Therefore, I plan to call a woman's domestic violence center to ask about counseling services. I know that I need to find the right fit but right about now, I am willing to take whomever is good enough because I REALLY need someone to talk to. I just feel like giving up and just lay in bed. I am finding it hard to get and stay motivated. I look around my apt. at all the clutter but can't be bothered to fix it. Sigh.