Support Group Session #2
Hello friends.
Weepy Wednesday. Yipes. This is going to get harder I guess before it gets easier. I don't have any pearls of wisdom to share from today's support group. We had lost two people and gained two, so we were still six. The format for today was different however. We had brought photos of our kids. After a candle lighting and reading and song ("I will remember you" -- very sad) we took turns holding a seashell which meant it was your turn to talk and no one else would talk. You could show the photos and talk about your child. Each story had me sobbing in sorrow, compassion, pain, loss, sympathy for siblings, parents, communities.
I spoke of Andy. I completely forgot the concise 5 words thing, LOL! But I feel good about what I said, and that I conveyed the magnitude of the loss, as did each person.
I'm going to send the FMO link to the facilitator so she can share it with the group as a potential resource.... and for other moms she meets over the years. REALLY wish we weren't having these endless technical problems... it's hard enough for people to enter and give things a try without glitches getting in the way. Arg.
I cried a lot afterwards in the car for my sweet bunny boy, all his terror, all his pain, all our sorrow. Then I thought of you Debbie 8-) as I put on my huge sunglasses, drove to Starbucks to get a nice latte and went off to a lacrosse game. Life does go on.
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Other than that, ok. Byron and I had dinner tonight, just us, a fancy little bistro, and it was good to talk about everything. Drew is having a prostate biopsy tomorrow and so we hope things will be OKY DOKY in there. Whether they are or not, it's an unpleasant prospect and we'll be glad when it's over.
I'm up late doing work at home tonight to make up for all this slacking, haha.
Hope you are all well and finding love and light in your lives.
OH! check this out:
http://www.printfection.com/andyheart
These are shirts we're selling for folks who want to support our fundraising for brain cancer research. But it's Andy's heart drawing! isn't that cool? and I didn't have to spend a penny or DO ANYTHING... the website does it all. The filling of each order, the credit card processing, the mailing. Please check it out!
Hey, just checked on sizes and for the t-shirt (dunno about other garments) they have LOTS of size options:
http://www.printfection.com/customer/size_availability_chart.php?rootid=7
xoxoxoxo Sarah
Weepy Wednesday. Yipes. This is going to get harder I guess before it gets easier. I don't have any pearls of wisdom to share from today's support group. We had lost two people and gained two, so we were still six. The format for today was different however. We had brought photos of our kids. After a candle lighting and reading and song ("I will remember you" -- very sad) we took turns holding a seashell which meant it was your turn to talk and no one else would talk. You could show the photos and talk about your child. Each story had me sobbing in sorrow, compassion, pain, loss, sympathy for siblings, parents, communities.
I spoke of Andy. I completely forgot the concise 5 words thing, LOL! But I feel good about what I said, and that I conveyed the magnitude of the loss, as did each person.
I'm going to send the FMO link to the facilitator so she can share it with the group as a potential resource.... and for other moms she meets over the years. REALLY wish we weren't having these endless technical problems... it's hard enough for people to enter and give things a try without glitches getting in the way. Arg.
I cried a lot afterwards in the car for my sweet bunny boy, all his terror, all his pain, all our sorrow. Then I thought of you Debbie 8-) as I put on my huge sunglasses, drove to Starbucks to get a nice latte and went off to a lacrosse game. Life does go on.
=======
Other than that, ok. Byron and I had dinner tonight, just us, a fancy little bistro, and it was good to talk about everything. Drew is having a prostate biopsy tomorrow and so we hope things will be OKY DOKY in there. Whether they are or not, it's an unpleasant prospect and we'll be glad when it's over.
I'm up late doing work at home tonight to make up for all this slacking, haha.
Hope you are all well and finding love and light in your lives.
OH! check this out:
http://www.printfection.com/andyheart
These are shirts we're selling for folks who want to support our fundraising for brain cancer research. But it's Andy's heart drawing! isn't that cool? and I didn't have to spend a penny or DO ANYTHING... the website does it all. The filling of each order, the credit card processing, the mailing. Please check it out!
Hey, just checked on sizes and for the t-shirt (dunno about other garments) they have LOTS of size options:
http://www.printfection.com/customer/size_availability_chart.php?rootid=7
xoxoxoxo Sarah
Replies
Sarah,
The shirts are beautiful and I like the kelly green but have just crossed over the XL range since Josh died.
It is a weepy Wednesday. I went to the doctor and the nurse was so nice and somehow we got to talking about big babies and I told her my biggest baby is gone. She gave me the biggest hug and the tears fell (but the dogs didn\'t howl unless they have extra sensory perception (ESP) at least that I know about.) lol
Thank you for sharing about your group. BTW my maiden name is the same as Andy\'s.
Love and support for all the pain you both went through.
Leda
No need for constant pearls of wisdom...sharing is enough. The wave of emotions in your meeting, followed by life now. So interesting how we can \"go there\" and then rebound back into daily life. We really are resilient aren\'e we...perfect example. I love the shirts...how YOUR heart must swell when you see Andy\'s drawing. I am a \"big\" girl too...so those would look a bit clingy on me...but they are sooo special. Love to you Sarah...
Hey I will definitely look into nice roomy sizes. Thanks for that feedback! I just clicked on all the styles but I\'ll check on comfy-womfy sizes. LOVE!
We have adapted....but never enough...grief is a mainstay of our lives now but not on the surface as in the beginning but always in the very core of our being. Groups when being individually introduced must remain on the surface of emotions in order to share...it is a naked and volatile place to be. I applaud you for being able to endure for not only your sake but for others. It is never easy to re-open that valve of eternal tears....to go there....but it is really a part of our make-up now and there is no denying that after the group has dispersed, the chairs put up...the light switched off..the candle blown out...that it is back into the world again where you must breathe again...and live. Andy would want it that way.
I hope your Thursday is much better and that Drew has good news from his procedure. Love and Brandon bear hugs to wrap you in....dale, brandon\'s mom
It sounds like a loving group.
The DS technical problems are hurting FMO. The activity is low on the current members because of all the frustrations and there are few new members, and those that do join we have no way of communicating to them unless they post a discussion on the group page. It\'s really a problem.
Love and hugs, Terry
http://www.printfection.com/customer/size_availability_chart.php?rootid=7
many sizes and colors available, at least in the basic t-shirt. Maybe not in tanks.
Thank you for sharing my friend.. I used your five words with some other angel moms and they loved it... I too had a bit of a weepy Wednesday.. it was raining so it fit my mood... as always you inspire me so thank you.. love to you...
I ordered a white ladies tshirt cannot wait until it arrives.. I love it and love the art work and that a donation does to a wonderful cause.. I will post a picture when it arrives.. love you
I ordered a white ladies tshirt cannot wait until it arrives.. I love it and love the art work and that a donation does to a wonderful cause.. I will post a picture when it arrives.. love you
Hope you find healing on this new journey and lots of love and light in your heart. Hugs, Amber
loved the shirts, the designs, the great photo of Andy looking so macho and brooding. Don\'t know about these support groups. Missed mine these last two months, nights when I want to be in bed. Hearing more pain from more parents, it\'s just so hard! I like writing like this so much better, anytime and anywhere. No need to always be deep and compassionate, sometimes just silly and grateful for our girl friends. Just read an article about female elephants surviving best with girl friends, old friends. Some monkeys, too. And me and you. love, Abby
Your \"no pearls\" to share ARE pearls! To have that loving kind of group where one feels safe... the timing feels just as it needs to BE for you and it truly is amazing how those tears can fall and then back into the reality of the day. Deep sigh...
So hopeful that everything is okay with Drew and holding positive thoughts.
How wonderful is that with Andy\'s design on the shirts!!! Wow! I\'ll be sure to do some serious checking it out dear Sarah. I just know that Andy continues to create on so many levels now... his dreams live on as does his LOVE.
With love,
Joanie
So neat that Andy\'s design are on the shirts. May lots of money go to this important cause. I am sorry the pain was so intense at that moment but as you said I bet it was good to speak of your precious son. Much love to you and sweet Andy, Linda
Oh and prayers and positive thoughts for Drew. xoxo
...that paragraph about crying in the car after the group...oh how I COULD FEEL YOU THERE...holding you/all in my heart....hugs....