Suffering

In my church we read the ministry of Witness Lee and Watchman Nee, and alot of the songs in our song book are written by them. Alot of them are about trials and suffering, because to be a Christian is not to have a trial free easy life. To be a Christian we must still have our sufferings. If we didn't have our sufferings we wouldn't need the Lord. We have to be thankful for our suffering because without them how would we turn to the Lord?This song is really meaningful to me, and whenever we sing it in church I want to cry because it brings my emotions to the surface. It just makes me feel so sad, and one time I even ran out of the room when we were singing it, because it just made me think of the bad day I had at school that day. But more than anything, through the words that Watchman Nee wrote in this song you can truly feel how much suffering he went through when he was captured and put in prison for preaching the gospel. But through all his suffering he still turned to the Lord. I too need to proclaim more "Let me learn, O Lord, YOU ARE MY REWARD!" instead of staying in my suffering. Let me love and not be respected;Let me serve and not be rewarded;Let me labor and not be remembered;Let me suffer and not be regarded.'Tis the pouring, not the drinking;'Tis the breaking, not the keeping—A life suff'ring to seek other's blessing.A life loving and true comfort giving.Not accepting pity and concern.Not accepting, solace and applause;Even lonely, even forgotten,Even wordless, even forsaken.Tears and blood my priceFor the righteous crown shall be;Losing all, my costFor a faithful pilgrim's life.'Twas the life, O Lord, that You chose to live.In those days when on earth You walked,Gladly suff'ring all injuries and lossSo that all might draw near and repose.I cannot see how much farther I shall go;Still I press on knowing there is no return.Let me follow Your pattern so perfect and true,Bearing ingratitude without complaint.In this time of trial, O my Lord, I prayThat You'd wipe all my hidden tears away;Let me learn, O Lord, You are my reward,Let me be others' blessing all my days.