struggling

I'm sitting at work and all I can think about is going out and buying blades. I dont know why I have been doing really well for months and have barely thought about it. No its all I've been able to think about for almost a week. My friend said if I do she will kick my ass and if work finds out theyll make me go to the psych ward again for an evaluation. I have therapy tomorrow morning and dont get off work until 11pm so Im hoping I can make it through the night.