Stronger each day (but ouch!! still hurts!!)

This is actually the first day I have gone without talking, texting or otherwise contacting the Xanax addicted "love of my life" (not any more, I get it, just hate it!)!  I know it is like someone dying that you love.  Time WILL help but it seems to just go by so slowly, I don't do slowly well!!!  I am doing my best to stay busy but my mind keeps going back to him!  This site of wonderful caring people has made a major diff.  Time goes by and although I talk about him, I accept more and more why it CAN NOT be for us!  Not unless one day, on his own, he gets over his addiction and comes to me on my terms.  So basically there is still hope and I am as sure it will happen as me winning the Lottery...twice...in the sameday...and having the only ticket...in both, in other words FAT CHANCE but it is not out of what GOD could make happen if it is supposed to.  Mean while back in reality, I am not looking for a replacement I am just working on me, my house, kids, friends and living my life.  God will bring me love again!  I am sure of it, in his time, not in mine!  I do hope he is running a little ahead of schedule!  Did I mention I don't do slow well!!