Status Remains Quo
Day 8 NC. Still feeling major void. Looks like xAP tried to call me yesterday. I didn't realize this, but the iphone will tell you that a blocked caller attempted to call. So my imagination is working overtime to try to figure out why she called.
I had lunch today with my real best friend - my ex-girlfriend from college, more than 41 years my friend. She pretty much told me everything I've read here. It was pretty senseless in the first place. I never really could understand what xAP's motives were in sustaining or ending the relationship, etc. Intellectually it all makes perfect sense.
People get divorced all the time. Why is it that we on this forum are in some other territory where we bemoan our cheating, lament the loss of our APs, and can't divorce our spouses. Others would find this sequence to be perfectly reasonable.
Well, I was going to get a start on volunteering this week just to get myself out of my own way and focus on something and someone else. Also, I was going to start in at the gym again. However, my 20-something daughter is going through a tough time at the moment and it looks like I'll be going away for a few days to be a good parent. Maybe that'll be good, but it's going to be tough to be upbeat when I'm feeling so shitty. My daughter summed things up pretty well last year. Being an adult is one obstacle after another. Ain't that the truth!
I had lunch today with my real best friend - my ex-girlfriend from college, more than 41 years my friend. She pretty much told me everything I've read here. It was pretty senseless in the first place. I never really could understand what xAP's motives were in sustaining or ending the relationship, etc. Intellectually it all makes perfect sense.
People get divorced all the time. Why is it that we on this forum are in some other territory where we bemoan our cheating, lament the loss of our APs, and can't divorce our spouses. Others would find this sequence to be perfectly reasonable.
Well, I was going to get a start on volunteering this week just to get myself out of my own way and focus on something and someone else. Also, I was going to start in at the gym again. However, my 20-something daughter is going through a tough time at the moment and it looks like I'll be going away for a few days to be a good parent. Maybe that'll be good, but it's going to be tough to be upbeat when I'm feeling so shitty. My daughter summed things up pretty well last year. Being an adult is one obstacle after another. Ain't that the truth!
Replies
Despair, I\'m so sorry that you are hurting.
I\'m so glad that you are journaling though.
For the next 3 months, write out a journal EVERYDAY.
Write out your sadness, your anguish and despair.
It\'s very good that you are keeping busy.
One day at a time.
You will get through this; I PROMISE.
I also promise that the answers you seek WILL COME.
One day at a time.
Big hugs.
Just remember in your journals you are SAFE from bashing.
If someone writes something mean.
DELETE IT.
You are in control.