Starting to worry myself

     I really have been having about of ups and downs lately. Everything sets me off, then i feel like a horrible person if i do or say anything.i think about death and the only part that really bothers me is not the fact of i have the though of suicide cross my mind but the fact i would hurt my kids. the fact that if my kids weren't around i could honestly say i would have noting what so ever to stop me from ending my life. i keep it hidden mostly the one person i want to care seem like he is just tried of all and wants out of the relationship.