Starting to worry about the anger

I noticed that the anger had fueled so much strength and detrminiation for me to set the boundaries..but the memories of him had been tainted with disgust and hatred..why am I so mad?..why the only person I want to be with for the rest of my life became the person I most hated in this world..without doing anything bad towards me...am I hating myself?..or am I hating myself when I was with him...?? The anger is unbelievably powerful..I'm like a wounded warrior that can massacre the whole town..why do I hate him so much?..because he found a new girl faster than I did..because he moved on faster or because he was able to successfully mask himself from the pain of the break up and tried so hard to show me and everyone that he didn't fall into pieces..and that I became a mess and hit rock bottom..was it because I broke up with him..stood up and had the courage to say it and fell the hardest??? ahhhh..the anger..and hate...i'm not used to this..but it keeps me strong..unfortunately, it keeps me strong...