Sorry everyone

Hey guys I know it's been two years since I've been on here a lot has happened in my life and then by the time I remembered to go on here I completely forgot the name of the website and took me forever to get back to this account. I need help guys and I need a serious opinion I had something really bad happen to me about two months ago and I need all opinions. So last time I was on here I was talking a lot about my ex, I have been single for two years now and tried to get involved again with someone. It was someone I knew from school growing up but was never friends with him when I was in school. We started hanging out a lot and I introduced him to my friends and we all hung out as a group but none of my friends knew I liked him and was crushing on him and one day he kissed me and it because a norm to us whenever we hangout that we would kiss. But we would never do anything sexual or touch each other or talk about having sex or doing anything sexual with each other and about two weeks after hanging out and just kissing one night we were in my room and we were kissing on my bed which we have done before so I didnt think anything of it and he started to touch me and he pulled down my pants and I said no more than four times and did not want to have sex with him I just wanted to kiss I wasnt ready to have sex yet. Now my question and where I need opinions is that considered rape? Please all opinions needed I haven't been able to sleep I've been having nightmares and I cant stop thinking about it. Its tearing me apart