Sometimes
I look at the calendar, it now have been 12 days since I received a text from my daughter...She wont answer my text or phone calls... so I did what I absolutely hate to do...have a conversation with her father,my ex. I told him I am worried about her and explained about the situation with the bartending school and her not going to them. He said she has told him that she has gone to the classes, so he confrented her about it, she try to make light of it, saying that she was going to do it, and that I am just annoying, after further explaining-and it is hard to talk to this man-he agreed that she is in the wrongdoing, but also said he cant make apologize or talk to me.
I told him she is not acting normal-and here is my very weird predicament-one day she is ok and a couple of days later she is sad, sleeping all day and have no energy,then the next one she is up and with all the energy in the world-the problem is that I believe,and I am not a therapist, that my daughter is bipolar. The worst part?
I think her father is too. I might be wrong, as a matter of fact, I will be happy if I am wrong-bipolar disorder is a hard condition for the sufferer to live with, and I dont wish it on nobody.
So, here I am, explaining all this to him, because right now she is not answering anything from me and he is the only one she is responding to, that I think she needs some help. Trying my hardest not to tell him I think he is also bipolar. And he goes on to explain me that he thinks she needs help and in at the same time tries to minimize any wrongdoing by her or him-had to really, really stop myself from biting the hook and making the conversation about him.
I have let her messages telling her that I love her, that we need to talk. But I can't help her if she doesn't want to talk to me. This is really hard. In the midst of all this, her paternal grandmother called me and said she is going to take a trip with her to, in part, to see what can she do to help her, because she also notice the depression.
So they left last night. They will be back the 27 of November.
My wonderful Al is on a gig, I miss him, terribly. I'm holding my breath with a knotted stomach...
Maybe I'm wrong, maybe is better if I stay out of her life, maybe I'm hovering too much...I dont know anymore.
I told him she is not acting normal-and here is my very weird predicament-one day she is ok and a couple of days later she is sad, sleeping all day and have no energy,then the next one she is up and with all the energy in the world-the problem is that I believe,and I am not a therapist, that my daughter is bipolar. The worst part?
I think her father is too. I might be wrong, as a matter of fact, I will be happy if I am wrong-bipolar disorder is a hard condition for the sufferer to live with, and I dont wish it on nobody.
So, here I am, explaining all this to him, because right now she is not answering anything from me and he is the only one she is responding to, that I think she needs some help. Trying my hardest not to tell him I think he is also bipolar. And he goes on to explain me that he thinks she needs help and in at the same time tries to minimize any wrongdoing by her or him-had to really, really stop myself from biting the hook and making the conversation about him.
I have let her messages telling her that I love her, that we need to talk. But I can't help her if she doesn't want to talk to me. This is really hard. In the midst of all this, her paternal grandmother called me and said she is going to take a trip with her to, in part, to see what can she do to help her, because she also notice the depression.
So they left last night. They will be back the 27 of November.
My wonderful Al is on a gig, I miss him, terribly. I'm holding my breath with a knotted stomach...
Maybe I'm wrong, maybe is better if I stay out of her life, maybe I'm hovering too much...I dont know anymore.
Replies
I don\'t know what to say. You might do well to back off and see how she handles this. It could just be that she is depressed and not bi polar but you know your daughter better than anyone.
There are other members of her family that are worried about her. See what the grandmother can accomplish. At times like this our children always think we are hovering.
Azuca, I don\'t think she is bi-polar. I think she may have a substance abuse problem. The behavior you describe is almost exactly as my niece exhibited BEFORE it was discovered that she was using drugs. Instead of having other family members inquire, think about a family INTERVENTION. My prayers are with you. This is a toughie!
Thank you both Trisha and Kathi, I am just trying to understand...but I think you both have a point, I will let her have this vacation without me trying to contact her...and Kathi, believe it or not, I had not consider the possibility...Al has been suggesting it might be that she is involve in something...I have close my mind to the possibility....an Intervention in the near future might be the answer.
I dread having a meeting with her and her dad, my friend Lydia offered to come with me if I do this, she also thinks is a good idea. But it is something that if I do, I will be doing out of love for her...a simple conversation with him leaves me with the feeling of sand in my mouth...this is hard. Trish, and Kathi, thank you for being my friends....