So this is rock bottom.

Hey guys. I've hit my rock bottom. It's really uncomfortable here. I can't upload any new songs to my I-Pod. That gave me a nervous breakdown. I've been trying to fix it for two weeks and it stiill won't let me on to the I-tunes store. I know I sound like a drama queen. But music is all I have and just...ugh. I found a scale and weighed myself. It's really bad. Like I'm in the middle of my healthy range not even on the lower end. How the FUCK did that happen? I think my body just goes crazy and even when I'm starving half the time I don'tl lose weigh because my metabolsim is so screwed up. My mom doesn't think I'm sick enough fro treatemtn and I strongly suspect it's because I'm not skeletal right now. She was so much more concerned when I was skeletal and now she's likew oh it can wait cuz you're FAT. I keep having to prove to her how sick I am and it's so very sad on the outside looking in. A little girl trying to kill herself to prove she needs help. Oh yeah. And I purged. Whoop de FUCKING doo. Fuck this LIFE.