So I\'m out/Easter

Christos woskriesie! Woistinu woskriesie! Christ is Risen!  Indeed He is risen! These are words that orthodox catholics greet themselves during Easter. I'm not an orthodox and it is not orthodox Easter yet. But I have some orthdox in my family, and always loved this tradition. It shows that we want to share the greatest mystery of catholicysm. God Himself died on a cross to rise and win death. He forgives us all our sins, gives us all new chance. This mystery is so important for me these days. I have moved out, now to my parents as I can't afford renting anything at the moment. The decision is set. I don't know where this will lead to. I hope, that it will not be a divorce. Not yet. I hope for just one more chance. If I waste this, there will be no more excuses for me. But it might be so, that She no longer has power nor will to try again. She tried so many times, why should She try once more? Why should She believe me this time while I lied Her so many times (sometimes also about this subject) in the past? I know I have to stand up to this situation. I have to stay in truth no matter what happens now. This is the only way that can lead me anywhere but to more trouble, misery and pain. My and others. This is also the only way that can give me that little chance, and that little hope, that She will let me return. To our home, to Her life. I ask those of You who believe in God for a prayer for me. If You can, pray that I could stay in honesty and that I could receive just one more chance. And I will pray for all of You, believing or not, to be forgiven and stay truthful. God bless You all. And happy Easter!