So hard.

I've been with my wife for 8 years married for 4. We have 2 beautiful kid. She came back from a trip to New your in Sept and told me she wants a divorce.. since then she has admitted to finding someone else and having an emotional affair with this guy before she went to New York. When she went to New York is when she says the feelings grew stronger.

Since Sept she has taken off for a week straight and lied about when she's coming back and where she was also leaving me with the kids and not calling or asking about them. She has also gone out to see him and lied about it and Everytime she goes she ends up spending extra time there. It's like that is her new life and she's running from what she's done not just with me but our kids. I know it's over between us us it's just very hard to think that the person who promised to be there till the day we die could so maliciously do this. There is so much more that I haven't mentioned I just don't know or understand why she would do this to me and our family. It's just very hard to deal with and if not for my kids who I have I would crawl into bed and not get out. Even with my kids I find it extremely hard to get motivated for anything. Any suggestions as how I can deal with this crippling depression would be great.