So angry

I’m so angry all the time. I know it’s not healthy. I want to trust my husband so bad but I’m having a really hard time. Sometimes I wonder if he’d be better off without me. I’m making everything worse by not trusting him. I feel like st times I do forgive him for cheating in me, but then he’ll do something or say something that doesn’t seem to add up, and I’ll go right back to not trusting him. I need help, and I don’t even know where to start. I’m so torn. It’s killing me.