Slipping
Feel stuff sort of creeping in and feel myself slipping toward dark places of my mind.
I have no self control, seriously. I get impulses to go look OW up. I want to believe all the stuff about karma biting her in the ass. Notsomuch. Though it's a big enough target to hit, you'd think...
http://statigr.am/p/305516724354691406_217466675
" I am exactly as drunk as I look." Good for her. Fucking lush.
I have dozens of photos of her drinking/drunk. If I were a zillionaire and felt like risking whatever fallout there'd be, I'd rent a billboard near her office and have them plastered for everyone to see.
When I saw this photo:
http://statigr.am/p/318217230369829063_217466675
I thought... YES. Yes. This is exactly how this should be decided. I will learn to shoot and I'll challenge her to a dual at sunrise and then I'll have her out of my life for good. Yeah, well, I guess there are serious flaws with this plan, but I gotta tell you, it's tempting. It'd put me out of my misery one way or the other.
OK OK. Stay in the moment.
She is only in my "now" because I allow her in. She only has the power that I have given her. Whether she is happy or sad, fruitful or failing, it doesn't matter because it only effects me because I allow it to effect me. Right?
Right.
But if there is a God she will be hit by a bus. And live through it. And then be hit by lighting. And live through that. And then be hit by lightning again. AND LIVE THROUGH THAT. And then she will be eaten alive by barracudas who will spit her rotten, dirty, skanky corpse out. Then her bits and pieces will float out and sink into the deepest part of the sea, never to be seen again.
Aaaah. See? Now THAT's better.
I have no self control, seriously. I get impulses to go look OW up. I want to believe all the stuff about karma biting her in the ass. Notsomuch. Though it's a big enough target to hit, you'd think...
http://statigr.am/p/305516724354691406_217466675
" I am exactly as drunk as I look." Good for her. Fucking lush.
I have dozens of photos of her drinking/drunk. If I were a zillionaire and felt like risking whatever fallout there'd be, I'd rent a billboard near her office and have them plastered for everyone to see.
When I saw this photo:
http://statigr.am/p/318217230369829063_217466675
I thought... YES. Yes. This is exactly how this should be decided. I will learn to shoot and I'll challenge her to a dual at sunrise and then I'll have her out of my life for good. Yeah, well, I guess there are serious flaws with this plan, but I gotta tell you, it's tempting. It'd put me out of my misery one way or the other.
OK OK. Stay in the moment.
She is only in my "now" because I allow her in. She only has the power that I have given her. Whether she is happy or sad, fruitful or failing, it doesn't matter because it only effects me because I allow it to effect me. Right?
Right.
But if there is a God she will be hit by a bus. And live through it. And then be hit by lighting. And live through that. And then be hit by lightning again. AND LIVE THROUGH THAT. And then she will be eaten alive by barracudas who will spit her rotten, dirty, skanky corpse out. Then her bits and pieces will float out and sink into the deepest part of the sea, never to be seen again.
Aaaah. See? Now THAT's better.
Replies
thank you for writing about it. It made me feel better. Because I am not the only one...... Unfortunately I don\'t really have words of wisdom that work which I could share with you. But I can say that I fight a similar struggle.
If I come up with a brilliant solution how not to - I will share.
In a meanwhile - keep writing/venting about it since it helps. Breath deep. And be good to yourself.
Oh, and she is ugly. She looks a bit like Paula Broadwell (no comment) after having gained 60 pounds and having lost 60 IQ points.
I know it\'s petty of me, but that made me laugh out loud. Paula Broadwell has a LOT more going for her than OW, that\'s for sure.
Making up stories always makes me feel better =)
In my version she\'s walking on an overpass and gets hit by a bus, flies off the overpass (and is somehow still alive). Then gets run over by multiple cars (still alive) and happens to get thrown over a cliff and lands on some pointy rock below. And yes, she\'s still alive at this point, but then the sharks come and eat her.
Good for YOU! Whenever I hear there has been a road fatality in town, I hope its HER. I picture her pinned beneath an 18-wheeler.. in agony and taking her last breaths. I would go to her funeral with a smile on my face and tell the grieving mourners what she did. How about THAT?? LOL!
That is only because she NEVER apologized. She called me to hurt him, then said I was \'innocent\'. But she stalked him for a year. But i blame him. He dragged that trash into our lives, then when he was tired of her, she wouldn\'t go away.