Sleep Processing

I've slept most of the time since I moved the base camp from the motel to the house. I'm not sure how that is even possible, given all the sleep I took during the wait for the house deal to go through, but here I am, sawing logs instead of working. I often think my work would be more consistent with co-workers to help with the accountability, but that hasn't been solidly on my destiny card since 1995. I am an extremely independant soul, but balance in all things.

It feels like a productive sleep, though. I believe I am processing the tremendous change from 22 years of housewoofing (37 years of parenting) to whatever's next. Is there life after housewoofery? I have believed since I witnessed the growth of housewife neurosis in the 60's as a teenager that a life after housewoofery would be the cure for old wife neurosis, but even here in the far more diverse 21st century, the transition is ? ? ? Puzzling? Elusive? Unsupported? I keep making my brave bids for life after housewoofery and finding my latest efforts drowning in domestic expectations with every phone call from the hubs and sons. I believe Hubs and I are making progress on that phenom, but the middle aged children are still as self-absorbed as young children. Mothers are just mothers and nothing more. Always have been and always will be.

Been walking the property in between naps, piddling here and there as I wander through the whelmings of finding definition for the grand scheme which now has an ownership attachment as its first fixed point. Grand scheme? That implies organization, doesn't it? I think I need another nap. Maybe I'll have some clues on the next step in the grand scheme when I wake up. For now, I believe less is better. The strongest growth happens slowly.

Processing? ? ?