Today was very much like yesterday, in so far I had restless nights sleep, I think I must have woken again early, as it felt as if I didn't sleep at all. Perhaps I didn't sleep at all, it's hard to tell sometimes, I seem to drift.I got up because it was too bright to sleep, but I didn't get up until 9:30am - That is late for me, I would have liked to have stayed there I really wanted a proper sleep and I'm not getting any. I did manage to get outside the house and buy a few essentials down the shops, again the isoltaion is hard in the day time.I have mediation tomorrow with my ex and I'm not looking forward to it, being in close proximity to her makes me feel uneasy, it's not that I don't trust myself in her presence it's just that I would rather not have any contact with her at all. I hear people on DS mentioning the less contact the better, and I tend to agree. Although I want to move things forward and get the divorce over and done with, I'm finding it hard to face it, it feels like it's not my responsiblity for ending it, and so why should I be the one to fix it. Cowardly but I guess I would like to bury my head in the sand.I also think having no job right now has made my confidnece dip, and I really want to get back to work, I think I will phone a work agency tomorrow and see if they have anything so that I can start work soon.