Size 16 - HELL YEAH!
It's been four years since I looked this good and about eight since I felt this happy with how I look. I appreciate this so, so much more now I've been so far out over what my 'normal' weight range should be. I bought myself a bunch of new clothes, something I rarely do but decided I deserve it. The new clothes are lovely and I even stretched to grabbing a size 14 for the near future.
Going into the final year of my degree, I'm a lot more sociable and out going. I'm not afraid to be noticed anymore. It helps that my university friends are wonderful accepting, open minded people. I feel truly blessed to be on this earth. Which is not a feeling I am accustomed too - I feel like I belong, like I deserve to fit in.
It's not about the numbers on the scale anymore. Sure when they drop I'm happy but the increasing happiness eclipses all else. I am lucky, I am blessed. Now all I need is to get better and my world will be perfect! So happy now, it's ridiculous. I walk about with a foolish grin on my face most of the time. I'm no longer embarrassed to squeeze passed someone on a bus or get out of breath in public. Even when my face get's flushed and sweaty I no longer care what others perceive me to be because I know who I am.
My weight does not define me, you can't tell I volunteered with elephants from my dress size, my stretch marks do not tell you about my love of books and my rounded stomach doesn't show my dreams.
It's good to get through some head stuff like that. This journey is still not easy - I'm waiting for a diagnosis on why I can't keep any food down but my body will fix itself. I trust it to know what to do.
Going into the final year of my degree, I'm a lot more sociable and out going. I'm not afraid to be noticed anymore. It helps that my university friends are wonderful accepting, open minded people. I feel truly blessed to be on this earth. Which is not a feeling I am accustomed too - I feel like I belong, like I deserve to fit in.
It's not about the numbers on the scale anymore. Sure when they drop I'm happy but the increasing happiness eclipses all else. I am lucky, I am blessed. Now all I need is to get better and my world will be perfect! So happy now, it's ridiculous. I walk about with a foolish grin on my face most of the time. I'm no longer embarrassed to squeeze passed someone on a bus or get out of breath in public. Even when my face get's flushed and sweaty I no longer care what others perceive me to be because I know who I am.
My weight does not define me, you can't tell I volunteered with elephants from my dress size, my stretch marks do not tell you about my love of books and my rounded stomach doesn't show my dreams.
It's good to get through some head stuff like that. This journey is still not easy - I'm waiting for a diagnosis on why I can't keep any food down but my body will fix itself. I trust it to know what to do.
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