Silence

Sometimes the loneliness is overwhelming. I have been separated for close to two months, living with my sister in an apartment full of women and still there are moments where I feel so profoundly alone. I wonder how the hell I'm going to make it when it's just myself in an apartment. But I have no other option. I will let myself have no other option. I will get my own place and I will be independent. I'll just have to suffer through the loneliness of it all.
How do others do it? How do they cope with the feeling of what next? How is it possible that I'm lonely in a house full of people. I don't want to be here and I don't enjoy being with them... that's the only thing I can think of that's making me feel this way. What is it going to be like when I'm coming to an apartment with no one else in it at all, with only the tv for company?
The thing I'm worried about the most right now is over staying my welcome when relying on friends. I am told constantly to just get so and so a call or drop by any time... but I talk myself out of it because I think... weren't you just over here? Didn't you just have a conversation with them not that long ago? I don't want to be a burden to anyone.
I've got to get over this. I will get over it. I'm stronger than this. And I will not turn back to the stbx just because I don't want to be alone anymore. I won't.