She\'s Outa Control

It is January 19.  Any New Years resolution has long since gone out the window.  And I'm the one who threw them all away.   I feel a general loss of control over the past...ohhh, seven or so months.  I used to feel so on top of it, every day.  Now, food controls me.  Even for lunch, I am eating total crap that I don't even like.  I manage not to binge for about three days, feel really good about it, then fall right off the band wagon like I've made no progress at all.  It needs to stop, and I'm the only one who can do it. It is affecting my weight, the way I feel (physically, and emotionally), it is affecting my work! ( I can't write when I feel so taken over by my meals).  I know that I am the human...I am the one with the brain and the power and the ability to make choices and follow through with them--the food does not have these abilities!  Food is unable to control me, it is unable to force me to binge on complete garbage even when it's painful to eat.  I've been trashing my body.  It is my decision to do so, it has to be my decision to stop.  Get motivated, shed my laziness and STOP IT! Goal for today (even though I've already ruined it with crap eating, I know I can decide to stop binging at any point of the day):  No binging, no chocolate/candy.  Veggies, fruit and dinner, and no eating after 7--absolutely no binging after work before bedtime! I can do this.  I can.  Can't I?