Shall I scream?? YES!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, SUCKS, SUCKS, SUCKS, TIRED....Just ate a bowl of ice-cream and 3 brownies!!!!! Felt good, hate IF!! Everyone just kinda thinks well, here she goes again!! Hate family!! They kind of think that I am over-reacting! Screw them..whateva...I stay positive, pray, do the right thing when it's hard, think positive, BE FREAKIN POSITIVE, RIGHT NOW I AM JUST PISSED. Don't want to hear about timing, be positive, don't have a pity party!! My goodness I am so, so, so tired........
Replies
LET IT OUT! You have every right to be angry, sad, mad, pissed, annoyed and what ever else it is you are feeling! You are human and you do not need to be positive 100% of the time! I don\'t think any of us are. We need to be able to let out our pain or it will take over. Vent here all you want because we all understand! Infertility is one of the hardest things a person could ever go through. Add it to the stress of the holidays and it can be overwhelming. Yes, you will have better days and you will feel positive again, but in this moment if you need to scream and cry to let it out then you do just that!
Lioness said it best, do whatever you need to get through this. Since we\'ew been going theough this the holiday season can be crummy. Ans thats Im going to eat a satisfying portion portion of red velvet cake. So you\'re NOT alone, Im right with you.
It is so so tiring and wrong. I always say that IF is like a death. I have had my share I have lost my brother and father and to be honest the pain of IF has been equal. So don\'t be hard on yourself. It is a loss and like you wrote in your previous journal it takes enormous strength to continue fighting. I pray you have days of peace and I pray that 2010 will bring your miracle.
I agree with the above...let it out. IF is a B#@$% and it is not fair. Stay strong and know that we are here to carry you when you do not feel like it. I pray that 2010 will be the year for all of us.