Serious Venting Needed

    I find myself sitting here, and I am really not in a good place. I am upset that I feel like my word/opinion means nothing. So first off, what happened is that at the beginning of the week I was told that we would be trying to clean out the back hallway (which we never did), so on the day that I was supposed to be helping with this, I went ahead and cleaned up the back hall way. It is full of empty boxes that we are storing until our clinic moves (which we don’t have a move date, and construction has not started on yet). I went ahead and put aside large good boxes that I thought should be saved (we only get one or two per month), and I put like 50 small boxes into another box to go into the trash. (We get at least 5 small boxes through the month, and figuring that the move is at least 3 months away, I think we have time to collect a few new ones…

    Having her tell the front office to go through it again and to take some of the small boxes out is just like a slap in the face. It feels like she just told me that my opinion doesn’t matter, and even though I can explain myself, I just shouldn’t be heard or listened to. I feel like she is doing it to make me feel like I am the lowest person in the company.

    Talking to most of work feels like I just don’t belong… It’s like I care enough about everyone to always be at least congenial, if not friendly, but I just don’t think I really have friends. I have plenty of acquaintance’s, and some that are possibly close enough to be friends with. Like my neighbor, he has been giving me a ride to work for about a month now, and he expects very little out it, but with him and his fiancée I think that he is starting to get mad. For one he has had to add almost 2 hours to his day every day, and then there is the gas and wear and tear on the vehicle. Honestly, I don’t really blame him for wanting to go back to his normal schedule, I mean he just wants to be home and spend time with the people that he loves.

    I am upset that because he wants to go back to his schedule that it means that I will have to change mine. I mean I want the exact same thing every day. I hate leaving my house because it means I am not with my family, and I love when the end of the day comes. I am not happy with having to be to work at 6:30 in the morning, and not getting home until just before 5, and that is with a ride. Now that the neighbor wants to go back to his schedule it does mean an even extended day for me. The bus that he would drop me off to will run at 7, but then when I get off in a few stops, I must wait almost half an hour in the cold, to get onto my next bus. It puts me at work almost an hour later than normal, which also means an hour later getting off. I will get back to Pontiac by 5:30 and as long as my mother-in-law is willing to give me a ride home, then I should be home around 6, and if I don’t have a ride, then it is another hour walk on top of the bus rides already. The only certain time that I will have a ride is while it is cold, once summer hits I think I better just get a bike.