September 22, 2011 - General update on everything
Ok, things have died down some since the HR incident the friday before labor day. I really didn't have the greatest weekend - thanks to work. I went for my follow up with the oncologist who gave me my results for the PET scan. Turns out they have a diagnoses for my cyst situation. Yes, I do have polycystic kidney disease but I also have Tuberous sclerosis. I did check out what it is and looked at the pictures of the disease (at home) I couldn't believe it (the red bumps on my face (with a rash look), bumps on my nails, Very interesting. It even said that I would have cysts inside my body not only my kidneys but my lungs (which mimic emphasyma), inside my head and spine. The PET scan said my cysts are relatively small in size. The test really didn't tell me anything new since the last one. Again, its all benign so my oncologist relinquished his services to be taken over to my primary MD. GFr is 34% and creatinine level is 1.65. those # dropped some even though I lost 10 lbs and exercising. Who knows? I feel good, thats all it matters.
Came back to work on Wed, things were relatively quiet. I told Arlene first because Sonja was off. Arlene almost fell off her chair when I told her what was going on. Then I told Sonja on Thursday. Mornings seemed to be pretty gloomy but at least Sonja and Arlene are doing whatever its possible to make me smile and laugh. Trying to put me in a better mood. The 60 day "plan of correction" is really worrying me. Lately I have been extremely anxious and stressed out (maybe that is why my #'s are lower with the kidney function level - stress does not do anything for the body!). I find Monday is the worst day because I keep thinking in the back of my mind "what is she gonna do or say to me this week". Arlene has been a godsend to me, I feel bad that I keep asking her to lift my spirits up. I am afraid she is gonna get sick of me. Can't put my guard down. its up extremely high. On top of being so anxious and stressed out, I have been making mistakes in my other work and its not looking good with the other educators (we get blamed for just about everything - I went round and round with Mary today about #'s of people and room locations - turns out we cannot get the larger auditorium to fit 32 people so we have to squeeze people in our 30 person classroom - mary does not want the room location split up). We had some incident with some neuro module and respiratory module class where the class was overloaded with 32 people and the learning management system was not adjusted to the amount of people. Then, Judy and the ACLS class a week ago. Afew people claimed they didn't get materials for the class and were upset about it. 1. both are ER RN's - 1 person's materials were sent back in February and the other - who knows, got lost in the mail. I gave Judy dates when they were sent out. I didn't hear a peep after that. So, I went into the October 7 renewal class and saw there was a 2 person overlap. I successfully spoke to 1 RN but the other RN - I could not get her on the phone - the ER couldn't locate her at all, left a message with her husband who was home (apparently she didn't get the message). I get this email from Judy stating that the nurse came to her, all upset (are they really upset!! - probably not, Judy is getting a reaction about it), that she got a confirmation that she was moved to the December 15 renewal class and her schedule was already out. Why didn't this person call me instead of going to Judy about it?? Judy didn't exactly tell me who this person was, I don't think she wanted to tell me and wanted me to figure it out myself (this was just crazy!). I did, called her up on the unit (miraculously, I got through to her immediately), asked her about the situation and she said it was her. I told her as long as Judy ok'ed her to be in the October 7 class that was fine. She would bring her confirmation (for October 7) with her. I then moved her app to the October 7 group so I can include her in the roster. I did appologize and she accepted. end of story. This is a few of the situations I have been dealing with these past few weeks, now you know why I am so stressed and anxious. I am so worried about getting Jen's work done and accurate, that I am letting things slide. I haven't been on the internet at all at work - except for the hospital based learning management system. I know they have been checking because everytime I see something being updated for a minute, they must be running my report - they are finding nothing. Im keeping my nose to my work and not saying too much to anyone. I have a sticky note on top of my computer that says "POC" or plan of care. I have been coming in at 8 and leaving at 4 sharp (my watch alarm is set for 4pm). In the back of my mind, I keep thinking that she is still trying to get rid of me. I don't know how much more I can deal with the situation. Kaleida health or no - I need to make a decision fairly soon. I did put some feelers out to a few people. I made an appt with the employee assistance counselor for today. It went well - I spent the whole hour talking to her and told her the whole story about Jen. After all said and done she said "its time to dust off the resume - think about moving on when the dust settles after the new building opens and gates closes". I told her I was buying my time. Not to worry about what she writes in my employee file. They will look at it and won't believe a word of it because here she is, 6 months as a manager and I have 19 years of being a kaleida health employee. I see her again next Thursday and will continue to do so until after this 60 day POC is overwith. It will be my outlook for awhile.
Oh! This Electronic medical records is gonna kill me. Now IST security is looking for student names. I am trying to get these off but now Jen wants me to send only the December endate people because the october end date people are going to be done in about 3 weeks (she does have a point). She is scrutinizing me about why some of these instructors did not send their paperwork to me after I told her we were done (I am sure she documented that too in my file).
ok, enough about work. Its getting me depressed again. I do feel alittle better venting and writing it out. Thank you for putting up with it. Means a lot to me.
I had some horrible back issues for about a week and a 1/2 so I didn't run too much. I did feel better last Friday and did 3.5. Not too bad. My legs feel like they have been through the ringer (my body is telling me to take it easy, Im not 30 anymore). I managed to go to the last Tuesday night run with the group, did 4.5 miles but at the end of it, I got so sick (like vomited). Quite embarrassing. I didn't eat enough before running (should have more pasta based lunch and maybe a bagel for breakfast). I did good - 1:06. This weekend is that Linda Yalem run (the one who was raped at univ at buffalo say 20 years ago - they still have a run in her honor). Its a nice route. I do have to come early and register for it - I will try and get there about 8-8:15am. No more 4.5 mile runs for the rest of the year. I will keep it down to 3.5 mi at least twice a week. I was gonna be a coach for the beginning group but they had enough coaches this time around. I will inquire it for the spring. I will let you all know about the run and how I did, ok. I think I might do some spinning for the wintertime. Shoveling season is almost here so I will get my exercise from that fairly soon (seems like I get 2 ft of snow when everyone else gets 5 inches..LOL!).
Everyone! Have a great rest of the week. I will do my best to at least check in sometime soon. work situation has left me without DS during the day. Sorry about that.
Came back to work on Wed, things were relatively quiet. I told Arlene first because Sonja was off. Arlene almost fell off her chair when I told her what was going on. Then I told Sonja on Thursday. Mornings seemed to be pretty gloomy but at least Sonja and Arlene are doing whatever its possible to make me smile and laugh. Trying to put me in a better mood. The 60 day "plan of correction" is really worrying me. Lately I have been extremely anxious and stressed out (maybe that is why my #'s are lower with the kidney function level - stress does not do anything for the body!). I find Monday is the worst day because I keep thinking in the back of my mind "what is she gonna do or say to me this week". Arlene has been a godsend to me, I feel bad that I keep asking her to lift my spirits up. I am afraid she is gonna get sick of me. Can't put my guard down. its up extremely high. On top of being so anxious and stressed out, I have been making mistakes in my other work and its not looking good with the other educators (we get blamed for just about everything - I went round and round with Mary today about #'s of people and room locations - turns out we cannot get the larger auditorium to fit 32 people so we have to squeeze people in our 30 person classroom - mary does not want the room location split up). We had some incident with some neuro module and respiratory module class where the class was overloaded with 32 people and the learning management system was not adjusted to the amount of people. Then, Judy and the ACLS class a week ago. Afew people claimed they didn't get materials for the class and were upset about it. 1. both are ER RN's - 1 person's materials were sent back in February and the other - who knows, got lost in the mail. I gave Judy dates when they were sent out. I didn't hear a peep after that. So, I went into the October 7 renewal class and saw there was a 2 person overlap. I successfully spoke to 1 RN but the other RN - I could not get her on the phone - the ER couldn't locate her at all, left a message with her husband who was home (apparently she didn't get the message). I get this email from Judy stating that the nurse came to her, all upset (are they really upset!! - probably not, Judy is getting a reaction about it), that she got a confirmation that she was moved to the December 15 renewal class and her schedule was already out. Why didn't this person call me instead of going to Judy about it?? Judy didn't exactly tell me who this person was, I don't think she wanted to tell me and wanted me to figure it out myself (this was just crazy!). I did, called her up on the unit (miraculously, I got through to her immediately), asked her about the situation and she said it was her. I told her as long as Judy ok'ed her to be in the October 7 class that was fine. She would bring her confirmation (for October 7) with her. I then moved her app to the October 7 group so I can include her in the roster. I did appologize and she accepted. end of story. This is a few of the situations I have been dealing with these past few weeks, now you know why I am so stressed and anxious. I am so worried about getting Jen's work done and accurate, that I am letting things slide. I haven't been on the internet at all at work - except for the hospital based learning management system. I know they have been checking because everytime I see something being updated for a minute, they must be running my report - they are finding nothing. Im keeping my nose to my work and not saying too much to anyone. I have a sticky note on top of my computer that says "POC" or plan of care. I have been coming in at 8 and leaving at 4 sharp (my watch alarm is set for 4pm). In the back of my mind, I keep thinking that she is still trying to get rid of me. I don't know how much more I can deal with the situation. Kaleida health or no - I need to make a decision fairly soon. I did put some feelers out to a few people. I made an appt with the employee assistance counselor for today. It went well - I spent the whole hour talking to her and told her the whole story about Jen. After all said and done she said "its time to dust off the resume - think about moving on when the dust settles after the new building opens and gates closes". I told her I was buying my time. Not to worry about what she writes in my employee file. They will look at it and won't believe a word of it because here she is, 6 months as a manager and I have 19 years of being a kaleida health employee. I see her again next Thursday and will continue to do so until after this 60 day POC is overwith. It will be my outlook for awhile.
Oh! This Electronic medical records is gonna kill me. Now IST security is looking for student names. I am trying to get these off but now Jen wants me to send only the December endate people because the october end date people are going to be done in about 3 weeks (she does have a point). She is scrutinizing me about why some of these instructors did not send their paperwork to me after I told her we were done (I am sure she documented that too in my file).
ok, enough about work. Its getting me depressed again. I do feel alittle better venting and writing it out. Thank you for putting up with it. Means a lot to me.
I had some horrible back issues for about a week and a 1/2 so I didn't run too much. I did feel better last Friday and did 3.5. Not too bad. My legs feel like they have been through the ringer (my body is telling me to take it easy, Im not 30 anymore). I managed to go to the last Tuesday night run with the group, did 4.5 miles but at the end of it, I got so sick (like vomited). Quite embarrassing. I didn't eat enough before running (should have more pasta based lunch and maybe a bagel for breakfast). I did good - 1:06. This weekend is that Linda Yalem run (the one who was raped at univ at buffalo say 20 years ago - they still have a run in her honor). Its a nice route. I do have to come early and register for it - I will try and get there about 8-8:15am. No more 4.5 mile runs for the rest of the year. I will keep it down to 3.5 mi at least twice a week. I was gonna be a coach for the beginning group but they had enough coaches this time around. I will inquire it for the spring. I will let you all know about the run and how I did, ok. I think I might do some spinning for the wintertime. Shoveling season is almost here so I will get my exercise from that fairly soon (seems like I get 2 ft of snow when everyone else gets 5 inches..LOL!).
Everyone! Have a great rest of the week. I will do my best to at least check in sometime soon. work situation has left me without DS during the day. Sorry about that.
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