Selfishness
My older daughter has a few pat things that she tells me all the time - that no situation is "about me" is the greatest.
I know that I complain a lot - I have a lot to complain about. My life is not as I would have it, and I never seem to be able to do anything for myself without complaints from someone in my family that I have done so.
The girl is picking up this attitude, which is rather annoying (to say the least), telling me that I am "turning into my brother" because I at more of the ice cream than she did, despite the fact that I picked it up, I paid for it, and I replaced it (none of which he ever did), she screamed at me that I had done this.
I continue to live with people that think that I am supposed to meet their needs while meeting none of my own. I go food shopping and I am to buy food for them to eat and not buy anything for myself, and suffer for having purchased anything specifically for myself.
This was the way when I was a child - the boy children were more important; they were taken for drivers licenses - my older brother was sent to college while I was forced to leave home when I was 18. My younger brothers were then also taken for drivers licenses, while I did not get mine until I was 23.
Then my husband treated me as if I were an accessory to him, as well as his servant, and, even though I had two children and a full time job, I was the only one "responsible" for housework, childcare, and meal preparation.
While I was a child, I was unhappy. I always felt as if I were inferior; as if they felt I were inferior.
While I was married, I was unhappy - again, feeling as if I were inferior; treated as if I were inferior. But as an adult, I came to realize that I was the responsible one - I was the one bringing in the money and paying the bills, keeping the roof over our heads and food on the table. I was the only one caring for the house and the children - such as they were cared for - and, although it was insufficient (because I was spread too thin) I had no help with it from those that should have been helping me.
Being a single parent is difficult, no matter who you are or how much you have. When it was my children, there were two of them and not enough of me to go around. It was a constant nightmare. A never-ending nightmare, I thought at the time. Now I have my granddaughter, it is nearly as difficult as it was the first time, because this girl is ill. Trying to deal with her is hard enough, but dealing with the school and the doctors is worse.
I know that I complain a lot - I have a lot to complain about. My life is not as I would have it, and I never seem to be able to do anything for myself without complaints from someone in my family that I have done so.
The girl is picking up this attitude, which is rather annoying (to say the least), telling me that I am "turning into my brother" because I at more of the ice cream than she did, despite the fact that I picked it up, I paid for it, and I replaced it (none of which he ever did), she screamed at me that I had done this.
I continue to live with people that think that I am supposed to meet their needs while meeting none of my own. I go food shopping and I am to buy food for them to eat and not buy anything for myself, and suffer for having purchased anything specifically for myself.
This was the way when I was a child - the boy children were more important; they were taken for drivers licenses - my older brother was sent to college while I was forced to leave home when I was 18. My younger brothers were then also taken for drivers licenses, while I did not get mine until I was 23.
Then my husband treated me as if I were an accessory to him, as well as his servant, and, even though I had two children and a full time job, I was the only one "responsible" for housework, childcare, and meal preparation.
While I was a child, I was unhappy. I always felt as if I were inferior; as if they felt I were inferior.
While I was married, I was unhappy - again, feeling as if I were inferior; treated as if I were inferior. But as an adult, I came to realize that I was the responsible one - I was the one bringing in the money and paying the bills, keeping the roof over our heads and food on the table. I was the only one caring for the house and the children - such as they were cared for - and, although it was insufficient (because I was spread too thin) I had no help with it from those that should have been helping me.
Being a single parent is difficult, no matter who you are or how much you have. When it was my children, there were two of them and not enough of me to go around. It was a constant nightmare. A never-ending nightmare, I thought at the time. Now I have my granddaughter, it is nearly as difficult as it was the first time, because this girl is ill. Trying to deal with her is hard enough, but dealing with the school and the doctors is worse.
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