Self Love?...
Being good to yourself, loving yourself before others can love you...what does this truely mean and how does one learn/apply this philosophy and why does this attract others? It sounds rational and so simplistic; something that should already be pre-programmed into one's DNA at birth but the application sounds very problematic, trivial, & elusive for me...I've grown accustomed to degrading myself when I do 'stupid', careless things. If I could just jump out of my skin for 5 minutes, I'd tear myself a new one; rip myself a new ass-hole; etc then jump back in my skin, look in the mirror & admire my handy-work..."THERE - TAKE THAT YOU IMBECILE!" Having this much self-hate & being so critical of myself is such a far cry from being kind or liking myself. 'Loving myself some me' is such a foreign concept; just unthinkable. I had always wanted a companion primarily so I'm not alone with myself. Someone that can act as a mediator between my Jekyll & Hyde personality conflicts. If I become permanently alone, I will destroy myself for good; once and for-all. Left alone my money's on Mr. Hyde to beat the shit out of Dr. Jekyll. How can I either lock Hyde up or send him in permanent exile? How can I restore Jekyll & make him my true counterpart and the exclusive personality for my remaining days? This is just beyond my understanding, I can't seem to wrap my mind around this. This is rock-science for me. Not only do I not understand but I'm extremely frustrated in my lack of understanding of what appears to be elementary or fundamental to everyone else. Guess everyone elses' sanity paves the path for their clarity...I wonder if there's a 'For Dummies' book published on this subject matter...
So giving myself life is unselfish, but taking my life is? What I do with my life is between me & my GOD.
So giving myself life is unselfish, but taking my life is? What I do with my life is between me & my GOD.
Replies
I understand the self hate and being critical. How do we build up our self esteem?
You are a wonderful caring person!!! I think we can still love others even if we don\'t love ourselves enough.
You start loving yourself by doing loving things for you. Take care of you. Love is something that starts from the inside. Once love is in you it will flow out. I\'m talking genuine real love. The first thing you have to do is forgive yourself for what you\'ve done wrong.
You start loving yourself by doing loving things for you. Take care of you. Love is something that starts from the inside. Once love is in you it will flow out. I\'m talking genuine real love. The first thing you have to do is forgive yourself for what you\'ve done wrong.
We are in the driver\'s seats of our own lives. We need to do what we feel is best for ourselves. If someone disagrees that is fine then we can politely agree to disagree. If someone fails to respect our right to think for ourselves that person may be into issues of needing to control other people. I consider such people as \'TOXIC\' and will go out of my way to avoid them.
Take very good care of you and do what you want to do with your life. As long as we are not harming others with our actions it is our business what we do with our lives. Only close friends that have a vested interest in your life have any \'right\' to say anything and those of us on the outside looking in should only offer our support where we can but only do so knowing that you must decide what is best for you.
((hugs))
:-) Patricia
I don\'t think that anyone can write an instruction book for our deeper problems. For myself I seek writing or people who resonate -- who remind me of better times and things which do make sense.
It\'s like you are going shopping and all you can find is a one-size fits all outfit - me thinks you have to tailor your own and reject what doesn\'t fit.
I share and can understand your frustration.
well i for one think you are a lovely person. always got time to help others. A lot of us can relate to self hatred.It takes a lot to like yourself. Especialy when ur suffering. Take care hugs jacki
You\'re right. Your life is your own. Continue to do what you can for others and perhaps some will rub off on you every once in a while. I, for one, like seeing you here on DS.