second rape........

so this is the time of the year where my dreams will start to be really bad because it's near the anniversary of my second rape......i don't remember the date because i blocked it out of my mind for so long....and i didn't think it was rape at that time too.....i HATE not knowing the date because it makes this time of the year so much harder......it makes me so much more anxious for a longer time....i'll just be glad when this month is over.....i just want it to be over....