Schhol or job
I was making the goal school and work. God provided me with a one day a week job with some extra days when needed. I am doing good at my job but while working got in a hit a run accident. I was stopped at a stop light when someone hit me from behind. then took off. My neck back ribs and hips are all out of whack muscles are torn and I am in a lot of pain. After summer I am going back to school. I just have enough to work on now. Don't want to push myself too fast. No relapses here.....
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I had a flash back last night. It hasbeen so long since something triggered me. And you never know what it is till it happens. I now have to go through the day after when you are so mentally drained and the thoughts still linger on. This time it was a little different I wanted to drown my self. Put myself out of the misery. I felt this feeling when I was under water that was so peaceful....But God butted in and got me out of the bathtub. Thank you God !!!!!!!!! It is so hard to not be embarrassed ashamed when some unlucky soul gets to see it.
I am sorry I just read this. I hope you are better. I am having flashbacks all of the time. I\'m use to em. ..And suicide is not the answer. It just sucks the life out of the people who love you. ..get help. And I mean it. get some mental help counseling.....etc. I am going to bed and saying a Prayer for you. Stay safe.
I hope you are ok, I just wanted to thank you for all your wise words , of encouragement. ..and you need some reassurance too. You are so WORTH it, you are going through a lot , I am or I\'ve been through. My doctor told me I can lawsuit---sue my dad. civil lawsuit. still working on restraining order. Not wanting to go to bed again. not sleeping good. very exhausted too.
I hope everything is ok. I am embarassed because my memory is gone. Its like having mini strokes. blacking out, computer. writing words, dont need...
crashed into my computer earlier this am. / took nap, tired again. tired of being on the run. having to hide things, bills, mail, important stuff. then what about my other stuff?? will he mess up my computer? Nightmares of him.
I\'ve mostly been grieving Mom. and how he treated her.Horrible man---
I went to the cemetary today for the first time since before last Christmas. Its been a long time. I had some peace and calm come over me. cause after dad is over torturing my life, quits it, she will BE at PEACE. I believe that. Mom will not rest until my brother and me are ok.....
And I pray you are ok, WE DON\'T GIVE UP. that\'d mean they WIN. and WE are the WINNERS. -they are not. Keep in touch. I\'m so mind boggled.--)
Hey girl ! Its good to hear from you. Sounds like things are going well. I am so happy for you honey. I don\'t come back to this, after I write in peoples journals. so I don\'t know how to get back to all of them. ???!!! lol. dumb blonde disease!
You take care girl. and yes I have cut dad out of my life. working on restrain.. order. Aug. 30. - will be working on it September. 2012 has been such an awakening year for me. I am totally different person. - woman. All that time, I felt still like a child - teen. you know ptsd. and now I am finding out who I am. kind of scary. so dad said I\'m OUT OF THE WILL. oh well !!
I am glad you are ok. I was worried there a while. KEEP IN TOUCH, k.
HuGssssss
Well this is EMBARASSING!! : I shake my fingers, tremor, and I sometimes accidentally DELETE my FRIENDS. and I\'m sorry about that. WILL YOU B MY FRIEND???? .....LOL.... My mouse goes where it wants!! ..
anyway, I hope you are well and can enjoy Thanksgiving. tc.