scariest experience of my life....

tonight i was more scared than i ever have been...EVER....when i was in the hospital i was not this scared...when i was close to committing suicide i was not this scared....when i had asthma attacks i was never this scared....what happened was this: i went to the doctor last night and my chest was kind of tight so he gave me some steroids to open up my chest....today my breathing got worse....i called the office and was told that the PA would be notified and that i would be called when she made her decision on what to do....well i called when i received no call an hour later....my cough was beginning to worsen and it was getting really hard for me to breathe now!!! my nebulizer medication was expired....i was getting lightheaded from coughing so much.....i called and asked if they could refill the medication....i was told that they couldn't and that if i needed a nebulizer treatment i should go to the hospital....i called a neighbor and she drive me to urgencare....when i got there i was so close to not breathing.....a nurse came while i was being checked in and checked my oxygen level....i was called back while my neighbor stayed in the waiting room....i was waiting for the doctor and my breathing was worsening....i felt like i was going to fall over...i walked over to the door opened it and said, leaning against the wall,"i feel like i'm gonna pass out"....the nurse told me to sit down on the exam table.....i didn't want to.....there were no sides, so if i fell over i'd fall to the floor....the nurse started me on a nebulizer treatment.....i started crying....i kept coughing during it and i was so scared...all i thought was,"i want my mom!!!! i want my mom!!! i want my mom!! I WANT MY MOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!" she wasn't with me and the only thing i wanted was her there with me holding me and telling me the things the nurse was trying to tell me......the doctor came in and trying to assess me as i'm crying my eyes out and trying to explain things to him and trying to breathe in the medicine all at once.....after that treatment it barely worked....i freaked...started crying more, tried to calm myself down more.....i was given a higher dose of steroids and given another treatment.....still coughing through the treatment, but less....still crying.....i was shaking from the panic attack that i was having at the same time.....i was shaking so hard that the nurse who was watching me said,"are you cold, val?" i shook my head.....the fingers were numb on both hands because i had been breathing so fast.....after i finished that treatment i was given a prescription for cough syrup with codeine in it....they sent a prescription for nebulizer medication to the pharmacy.....they gave me a xanex because it was close to an ativan and they never had ativan...i can't go to work tomorrow and i have to take nebulizer treatments every 4 hours....my mom told me to call her or my aunt-who is also a nurse-if it gets bad to be rushed to urgencare or the ER or whatever....my neighbor drove me to the pharmacy and i got all my meds.....i was so scared....i truly thought that i was going to die....i really did.....it seemed like nothing worked...i had no idea if i was going to crash to the floor and die, crash to the floor and pass out....i was so scared....i was crying because i was so scared, but the main reason i was crying was because i missed my mom and dad.....i wanted them there with me...i almost had a coworker drive me....if she did i would have asked her to come in back with me...she would have....she would have held my hand...she would have supported me and helped me when i cried.....it was the most scary experience of my life and i am so glad that it's over