Saturday was amazing
Well as amazing at it can be considering I had to see my husband in the confines of a prison. I guess I had read all the horror stories of how visiting has gone wrong and where people have been denied for silly reasons that I had it in my head that it would be horrible. But it went so smoothly. The guards and a few visitors even commented on how good our baby did. Even more importantly, she hadn't seen her daddy in 6 weeks and she acted like she still remembered him. She smiled, and did that lean thing she does when she wants the other person to hold her as soon as he sat down next to us. I show her a picture of him every night though and tell her that daddy loves her. So I'm hoping that helps.
I was exhausted when I got home though. I left a 4 am to get there right before 8 (took a longer route but it was a major highway vs driving on a two lane highway in the dark). Was the sixth person in and he came in right before 9 so six hours with him. He kept laughing because I told him that I was so conflicted. All I wanted to do was either jump him, curl up on his lap, or lean my head on his shoulder. And we had a good time. I said this is highly inappropriate but the green-blue color of his uniform is actually a good color on him. Too bad he won't want to wear that color when he gets out (which i wouldn't if I were him). That last hour flew by so quickly though. He hinted at wanting me to stay the night and visit him on Sunday but I wasn't prepared as this was our "trial run." I felt bad telling him no. But I'm going to visit at least once a month now if not more.
And I didn't cry when I left. First off I think I've cried all I can about this situation. I can't change it, I just have to deal with it so I'm done crying. Secondly as sad as it was to walk through those doors away from him, I was so happy to have seen him. And so far that jubilation has lasted a couple days. I'm hoping they last until I get to visit next.
I was exhausted when I got home though. I left a 4 am to get there right before 8 (took a longer route but it was a major highway vs driving on a two lane highway in the dark). Was the sixth person in and he came in right before 9 so six hours with him. He kept laughing because I told him that I was so conflicted. All I wanted to do was either jump him, curl up on his lap, or lean my head on his shoulder. And we had a good time. I said this is highly inappropriate but the green-blue color of his uniform is actually a good color on him. Too bad he won't want to wear that color when he gets out (which i wouldn't if I were him). That last hour flew by so quickly though. He hinted at wanting me to stay the night and visit him on Sunday but I wasn't prepared as this was our "trial run." I felt bad telling him no. But I'm going to visit at least once a month now if not more.
And I didn't cry when I left. First off I think I've cried all I can about this situation. I can't change it, I just have to deal with it so I'm done crying. Secondly as sad as it was to walk through those doors away from him, I was so happy to have seen him. And so far that jubilation has lasted a couple days. I'm hoping they last until I get to visit next.
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So happy that it all worked and the baby did good that is awesome. I am kind of like you in that I got all the crying out in the beginning. I have kind of accepted it and look forwar to our future together I miss him like crazy I do get mad angry and sad but at the end of the day I know none of that is going to change the situation so I\'m looking forward waiting for the day he gets released waiting for the day my son sees his dad again and moving on from there! I\'m so happy you had a good day!