Saturday morning,three days till ho ho ho

Good morning journal,the time is 6:07am;and I am once again awake and in my chair.I missed your company yesterday,but demands on my time meant that some things would inevitably remain undone,I'm afraid that one of those was you.However I am here now,so,no matter;I remain unscathed by my absence,and I have new things to tell you,so,if your sitting comfortably,I will begin.Yesterday my wife woke me at 9:00am,she would have let me sleep on,but I had my first appointment with my very own cognitive behavioral therapist,and I first had to ensure that I was semi mobile and functioning.After several life restoring coffees and a quick rummage through my thoughts,I was as ready as I would ever be,and I set off to meet my new therapy buddy with an open mind and a hopeful heart.On arrival,I had to push a buzzer for access,and a female voice informed me that she was "reception",and asked me my business;I told her,she buzzed and said"push the door,and report to reception";I did so and entered,reporting to reception,which was located immediately on my left.I looked through the window to find nobody in attendance,I waited,....and I waited,searching fruitlessly for a bell or buzzer to summon aforementioned receptionist,but to no avail;the disembodied female voice remained both elusive and invisible.Now, being a resourceful type of fellow,I read the notices and various posters on the wall,which informed me that mental health was located on the second floor,and noticing the elevator directly in front of me,I summoned it and rode to the second floor,......nobody was there.I was on the point of leaving,when a gentleman suddenly appeared,"I think your in the wrong place sir",said he,"mental health?",said I;"ahh",said he,"go back downstairs and tell the receptionist,someone will come and get you";I started to tell him that his receptionist had been listed"missing in action"thus far,but decided against it, and returned downstairs in the elevator.On looking through the window,the elusive receptionist remained,well....elusive,so I took a seat and waited like a good boy,fifteen minutes later,I heard the sound of descending footsteps on the stairwell,and a young man appeared,I began to rise in greeting,he looked at me,I looked back;he pushed a button on the main door and left.I sat down again;ten minutes later,more footsteps on the stairwell,another young man,I stayed seated;I was not about to expound any more energy getting to my feet,only to have him too,exit the premises.He said my name,I nodded in affirmation;"thank you for being so punctual",he smiled;my first thought was,no,I was punctual when I arrived,now,based upon your arrival,I am late;but I bit my tongue,not wishing to appear churlish or grumpy."Reception been looking after you?",he asked,"well actually,I haven't seen reception yet",I replied;"good,good,"he said,"I've only seen her once in my time here,does a damn good job though!";now I don't know about you journal,but if I was paying the wages,I would most definitely be asking questions.
      On the ride up in the elevator,I asked,"so,did the receptionist tell you I had arrived?","oh no,"he replied,"I just checked my diary and came downstairs on the off chance";uh huh,I thought,I want to be a receptionist when I finally grow up.His office was very pleasant,nice comfy chairs,scented candles and incense filled the room with various aromas,each battling the other for supremacy,and none quite gaining the upper hand,resulting in an overpowering urge to sneeze;the urge finally overpowered me,and I sneezed,loudly."Yes,quite",he said,"I'm having to use this room today,mine is being decorated,"oh well,that was alright then I thought,  so next time,we'll only have the smell of new paint,with perhaps the aroma of fresh varnish to complete the ambiance,something to look forward to indeed."So,who's office is this?",I asked,"haven't a clue really,"he replied,"I've never met them,"leaving me feeling slightly uncomfortable with the feeling we might indeed be using the receptionist staff room;I would not wish to be responsible for them,her,him,it,missing their reviving mid-morning cup of tea after all their hard work downstairs.Over the next hour or so,we discussed various topics covering symptoms,possible causes for my depression,anger,pain etc:;at the end of which,he said,in his best therapist voice,"well,there is no doubt,your doctor's diagnosis is correct,your definitely depressed,"which eased my mind considerably;I like it when everyone is in agreement;much less confrontational I find,and much preferable to discord and argument over who is right or not.Then he said,"right,I think I know exactly where your at,but rather than alarm you now;we'll revue the situation after the fourth session;I'll be in a better position then to tell you what's wrong,besides depression I mean,"I said,well John,the phrase,rather than alarm you now,has umm...alarmed me;would you care to elaborate?,""no,"he said,"I want to be a little more certain,"and as I wasn't in the mood for guessing games,I left it.He then gave me a file to list when my depression was at it's worst,my not so bad days,any suicidal thoughts etc:,but that is for next time,which is apparently the 21st of January 2013 at 12:30pm;same place,same receptionist.He shook my hand and said,"see the receptionist on your way out,and let them know you will be returning on a regular basis,see you next time then,"whereupon I departed,riding the elevator to ground level,I looked through the receptionist window,.......where nobody sat yet again;in my depressed mind,which was not alarmed,I began to ponder the possibility,that the overall area of the room behind the glass window was,in fact,a space which had the power to orchestrate a sort of "Bermuda triangle"effect on all who entered it's hallowed dimensions;once there,they mysteriously vanished,never to be seen again;I thumbed the exit button and left.
      Upon my exit,I found my wife waiting for me to go shopping,and,on a whim,we decided to travel to the next town to shop,not having been there for some time.On reflection,and with the wisdom of hindsight,this was not a particularly good idea;the result being two very tired and cranky individuals when we finally returned home several hours later.The rest of the evening passed in periods of silence,interjected by short spells of stinted conversation,until we finally put an end to our misery by falling into bed,and,within a very short time,becoming fast asleep,my wife slightly before me;she still remains asleep as I type,my presence here only attributable to one of my dogs displaying sheer persistence in nuzzling me hard to rouse me;I remain now at my computer,the dog I mentioned?,gone back to bed with the rest of the pack;sweet dreams my brood.Well journal,I have rambled enough for this visit,time for fresh coffee and a good stretch,cramps and the Good Lord permitting;till tomorrow then,three days till ho ho ho,let's hope there is at least one ho left for Christmas morn;thou shalt not be without thy ho when Santa cometh,let it be so.Peace be with us.