Saturday-May 10th,2008

Yesterday,I decided not to do certain things anymore.I realize that Brad does not appreciate it and I refuse to get involved.I am not going to solve his or other peoples problems.That is because I cant.I do not have the education.I do not have any degree.And bad advice here is catching on.The local newspaper ran a story about some of these councilors in seattle and what they found is the reason why I am so depressed.There are 18,000 people in seattle who call themselves councilors but they are not qualified to do.They take a course for 40.00 and a class on Aids and they get a certificate and that is it.No wonder why I am so screwed up! This person was not qualified to give me advice.Just who do these people think they are! Some of them are all women who had tragedies in their life.One of them lost a child..But there is a support group for this.It is called Compassionate Friends.I used to go to their meetings after I lost Tommy in the 1970s and they did their best to help me,but they did not I did not get the proper advice.AS for me..I am still depressed and I am so full of rage.I am wondering why this has happened and I just cannot take certain people anymore.As for my best friend..she is on a different planet.She does not read books and such and she does not read magazines.All she does is talk about illness and the tests that she has had.And I do not want to go back because of this.SHe is just so unbelievable.Frank could talk about any subject and I miss him to this day.He was one of my best friends and he is even better then Brad.Brad will never be the man that my sainted father was.No man will ever fill his shoes and this is why I refuse to get married.