sat june 28th

today im sitting here this morning at my computer listenting to dr hook bringing back old memories and thinking where has time gone and good memories just got news one of my uncles in the hospital had a heart attack  i alsways thought he was the most handsome of my mothers brothers handsome enough he could have been a movie star i wish i coulsd go see him all my mothers people were from blue ridge parkway very big family 12 children in all most of them have moved on to be with god when my grandparents was alive my most wonderful times was going to visit all my cousins uncles and aunts would be there we slept on cots in cars camp grounds but my grandparents always welcomed us and enjoyed seeing us i can remeber seeing my grandmother as we left sitting in her rocking chair with tears in her eyes hating to see us leave i would watch in the back glass until she was out of site i miss her so much went to the liver specialist didnt get very good news health wise my liver stage is going into stage 4 and im needing to have something done for my knee and back so as soon as i go to the orthopedic he has to get in touch with them and tell them what the plans are but something has to be done soon as they can i was told any illnesses treatment for hepititis will make it worse liver doctor saids i need to start treatments right away i have cirrhosis but i have prayed and have became closer to god and i know no matter what the outcome im in his hands but its strange even though i have this awful disease life is good and if i have little time on earth i want to live my life to the fullest and let god take care of me and lead the way and if there is a deed that needs to be done or service for god i want to fullfill my destiny and remeber as long as god is on my side nothing is to be feared and not to dwell on things i cant change life and death are parts of the same great adventure and not fear to fear death and not to shrink from the joy of life