Sadderday - Christmas

Dearest,
  Spent the morning with Kristin, Pat and the grandsons. Was kinda fun, the kids help me forget, they have a constant string of small tragedies which they react to with their entire being. It is so cute! Then stopped by Audubon, took pictures and played with the critters. I was okay. Then I stopped by the cemetery to visit you. Well that was the end of that. Spent most of the rest of the day crying and sleeping. It is so sad without you.
Kristin gave me tupperwares (<- see the S) full of cookies! I am a rich man! Some men dream of fortune. Some men dream of cookies. The snow is supposed to begin tomorrow and continue through Mournday. The snowblower is all set, gassed up, tires inflated, and I ran it for 45 minutes today to make sure it was good. Had to use the electric start though.
Tomorrow I have to get the grocery shopping done early before the snow starts if possible, I need a surprising amount of stuff. Waking up this morning was incredibly difficult, just me and the ticking of the clocks, so sad, so lonely. I am totally pissed at the evil universe about this and I see some results, keys fit in locks, machines start and stop when they're supposed to. Now if the wind were to blow all the snow off my driveway . . . nah, I still won't forgive!
Till Tomorrow, Your Ken

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

The grandkids always seem to make things a little better if only for a short while. My kids came over tonight with the grandkids and it seemed to make things a bit better for me. Once they left though, the loneliness set in. Wishing you peace in the coming days and the new year.
Hugs,
Jean
deleted_user
deleted_user

That is it isn\'t it.......the waking alone each day...not for me the shock of the early days but still pretty darn lonely.

The grandkids are always fun to be around....they laugh and spat and then cry over the indiginities of having to share toys and then they start the process all over again. They never harbor grudges or let their sadness overshadow the fun to be found in the next minute or two. We should be trying to mimic them but our adult sadnesses are just not that easy to get over.

You are doing better and if it takes getting ticked off to make progress..so be it. Hope you get your groceries before the snow.....if not, hey you have cookies!!!!!!
deleted_user
deleted_user

What groceries could you possible need when you have tupperwareS full of cookies? Okay, maybe milk.
Glad you had your grandlittles to help you through the day. I witnessed a meltdown or two myself with my own littles. Small spats, toyed not shared, tears of indignities, then joyful hope as a new present was unwrapped. Oh, to have the worries of 3 & 4 year old.
Snow coming my way too. Not sure how I feel about that.
Blessings,
Linda
deleted_user
deleted_user

Enjoy your tupperwareS full of cookies, Ken!!

Glad you had the grandkids to be with. I so enjoy being around my darling grandkids.... but then it\'s also nice to have peace and quiet also.

Linda
deleted_user
deleted_user

I just told my daughter I can cope all day but that going to bed alone and waking up alone is a total bummer!
janalM
janalM

Tupperware ful of cookies, you are indeed a rich man. I am glad that the little ones could bring you some joy, and I too wish that the wind would blow my drive way clean. This acre and a half long dirve is a B.... You know what I mean. Hugs Jane