Sad comes out of the Blue
it was a good week getting out of the old and snow. EXCEPT THE FEET. But then the sadness hito and tears come and miss Kenny so much. Takes my breath away and the pain hits my heart when it is like I know for the first time Ken's gone, not coming back to this world. How so much I miss him. Trips to Florida was always a visit to Ken. Then he moved to Ala. I can't even look downtown passing through, I don't want to see UAB. THE MEMORIES STILL SO PAINFUL.. The pain is not as often yet when it comes it's the same...I don't cry as often, yet sometimes feel guilty I don't but know my body could not handle the harshness pain felt when our child dies. Sometimes I think people who believe in Heaven and Hell, that to me Hell is a Separation of the Love of God..I feel it is Hell being separated from our child..the deepest hell on this earth for me...life just keeps moving forward, keeps going on, we keep moving along with it, but yet a part of us is gone, never to find, only the hope of the future of being reunited with our children. ..but a deep lonely road. Mask or no mask, smiles or no smiles, the loss of our child is to me Hell. Separated from my wonderful son who deserved ,who all of us deserved our children to be here with us. Today is the Sadness that comes and overwhelms me...Never will I be the same, how could I, My child I can no longer hold, see, feel. Talk to...visit..he is beyond my reach..A road no mom or parent should ever travel...missing you Ken, always your mom. Always sending you my love. Forever mom
Replies
I wish I could be there to give you a real hug and cry with you. We will never feel the joy we had when our precious children were with us. Everything we do, no matter how joyous, is tinged with sadness. I too have times when I can\'t believe Lisa is gone. I agree, we are experiencing Hell on Earth.
I am only thankful that we have one another to travel down this sad and lonely road.
The tightest hugs to you and Ken.
Love, Marlene
HUGS ... Wow, I think you were in my brain when you wrote that. Just one more hug, one more laugh, one more smile .... Such an empty hole. !!!
I\'m sad that others feel this pain, but yet content that I have all of you who understand. I\'m not alone !! Many HUGS
Oh yes the hole in the heart that will never heal. The pain will come and go like a roller coaster ride.
tight hugs ~ penny
Yes, it seems so unjust that we must suffer so. We certainly do not deserve such grief! What is G-d thinking? It\'s five years now, and there are easier days. Hoping you will find some comfort here with us. Love, Abby
Sandi, you are so right we will never be the same and living without our children is Hell. I spent the day with our Jeff\'s two girls today. The 14-year-old played in a soccer tournament. I always feel so weird when we are around their Mom and their step Dad (that they call Dad). I get so mad thinking their Dad should be here raising his children not this man. Like you said the pain does not come as often but when it does come it is the same. Thinking about you my friend...Love and hugs, Nell
Yes, I know this feeling, a broken heart for the rest of my life, never again being who I once was.... Thinking of you, XOX, Debbie
Sigh....I know, Sandi. It hurts and even though the pain is gentler, there are times it hits and hits hard! I\'m so sorry. Tight hugs, Linda
As everyone has said we just have to continue to honor our children with this new normal of broken hearts. From Mine to Yours, Peace, Kathy
Thinking of you, my beautiful friend.
Gentle hugs to you! xxx