Rough Weekend

I had a rough weekend.   Paul and I have been volunteering at Hagley Museum for years.  I think Paul is over 10 years now and I am over 6.  Hagley Museum is how DuPont Co got it's start.  It was their original black gunpowder mill on the Brandywine River.  It is absolutely beautfiful there.  It is also a great place to volunteer.  They really treat their volunteers well, and thus have a great long term following.  Friday night was the annual fireworks, which is touted as one of the largest fireworks displays in the world.  They charge $30 per person to get in plus $25 per car!  It becomes a who's who in the upper echelons of Delaware.  These people set up huge tables with beer,wine, cheese, shrimp, etc.  So Paul, David and I volunteer in the kids' section from 6pm to 8pm and then are in for free!  And because we get there early, we put our chairs in the field, front row center!  The kids' section is a lot of fun- tatoos, hoola hoops, games, several of those blow up jumpy things.  We just monitor things and make sure no one gets hurt, or keep the lines moving.  We always have a good time and then get hamburgers and ice cream between 8pm and 9:30pm before we take our seats.  David just shut down before we left and it was rough getting out the door.  Thank God for camp.  The screaming all last week after Paul came home from his trip was horrible.  Starting Friday night, it just ramped up.  And after we got there, David really had a great time!  I thought that was the end of it.   It poured rain, cats and dogs here Saturday.  It was really bad.  Just to walk 2 seconds out my door to the car you would get drenched!  But the yelling and shouting and mouthiness was just so bad all weekend.  David refused to do any chores.  It got so bad that Paul broke down yesterday and cried and yelled and said he wished he had never adopted David.  Yes, David heard this.  I began to have my personal doubts as well.  David gets so angry, throws things, slams doors (he broke his closet door now, so that is also down.)  I am SO tired.  All of that wasted energy!  If David just got done what he is supposed to do, he could be watching tv or playing video games or whatever.  There are moments when he is so depressed.  Even when things were rough for me as a child, I just don't remember every being that sad or angry.  It is very disheartening to see.  Paul has to make a few follow up calls to AI DuPont Childrens Hospital about getting him into counseling there.   Paul is off his own meds.  He was on the generic form of Zoloft or Prozac or someting or other.  He said it wasn't helping.  Then his doctor said for him to take Adderall XR.  Well, Paul just became really mean.  David did not take his Adderall yesterday at all.  And only took 1 dose on Saturday.  I have to wonder what long term affect this stuff is having.  Yes, David is on withdrawal, although he took his dosage this AM.  But is this stuff hurting more than it is helping?  IDK. In the meantime, 2 days of bingeing and not writing anything down, being stuck in the house and I gained a pound.  I am very frustrated.  I will try to get myself back on track again.  I didn't even call my Dad yesterday for father's day.  I didn't even get a card for hubby.  Neither of us felt like celebrating.   I guess on a good note, my bathroom is all nice and clean and painted.  I ordered some new pictures and things for the wall.  (one not in yet and I want to wait to hang them all after I see what picture I want where.)  but I feel like I have a bathroom makeover, a new bathroom.  Paul is finally done the windows in the sunroom.  We can start replanting a lot of the plants and bringing them back in.  The rain has been so bad that some of the plants are dying.  I am sure we are going to lose some.  With the torrential downpour on Saturday, OMG, the ants in my house were everywhere!  Paul sprayed on Sunday AM, so hopefully that problem is solved.  It was disgusting!  We had had some in the kitchen, like if you left crumbs on the counter.  But Saturday they were all in the sunroom, my office, coming in the foyer and down the hall, my kitchen, UGH!  So I have to do some big time vacuuming.   I am reading Dan Brown's novel, Angels and Demons.  That was my one relaxation this week.  I am about 1/2 way through.  So this week is focusing on getting back on track, getting my work caught up, etc.  I also got "Spanish Coach" for my Nintendo DS and want to get on track with that.  So far, I have learned to say colors in Spanish and begun my lesson on days of the week.  I cannot for the life of me roll my R's, so my pronunciation is going to suck.  But I deal with so many Spanish speaking people on my job, so I am hoping this helps.  I want to learn to speak Spanish so bad.  I figure if I do well with this, I will invest the $300 or so dollars and buy Rosetta Stone as my next step.