Rough Day Not Bad At All
Usually Mother's Day is the hardest day for me. I lost my Mom when I was 15, then was never able to have any children of my own. Used to feel like I was not good enough or special enough for God to bless me with the most greatest gift. The feeling of life growing inside me , giving me a chance to love and nurture a special little person... A chance to give all the love and positive reenforcement that we never felt as kids.
Instead, I am feeling very good , positive and optimistic. I am finally taking charge and doing things that I have wanted, but continued to postpone. I am finally moving forward and have things to anticipate and plan and work toward. I am moving forward with the divorce, have just begun to follow through with the exercise and diet. There is a hell of a lot to do... but I will break it down so as not to get overwhelmed. Lots to look forward to ... finding another vehicle, new little place to live, getting a passport and planning a trip to see someone very special ( and a glimpse into his side of the pond) Is good to have all this to look ahead to. (Just crossing my fingers and toes someone does not put too much of a damper on things. )
(Thinking I could use a prayer or two that I can hold my own and things don't get too ugly. I would so like to end things on peaceful terms)
To all the Moms and those fortunate enough to still have a chance to tell theirs Thanks and you love them, I do hope you get to enjoy your day today.
Love and hugs from another Moms kid. :)
Replies
hugs my friend. is all I can say. Be gentle with yourself.
I can identify. I try to focus on the positive. I have seen her in a dream which seemed so real, it didn't seem possible that it could be a dream. I am sure I will see her again but not in this lifetime, not in this reality and that's ok because I know she is no longer suffering and she is being taken care of where she is....I have no doubt..
God Bless
sorry you lost your mom so young....I have a 94yr old mom still with us and heard tonight that the cancer responded to the radiation having shrunk....
Bill I am so happy for you both. Enjoy all those moments.. :)
Glad you are feeling positive and good!!
My husband made a comment to me how Mother’s Day has sort turned into a turd of a holiday over the last few years for us. He’s estranged from his parents and my mom has late stage Alzheimer’s, and I never had children (by choice). I visited my mom, got her flowers and a card which is what I’ve done for years but she’s not aware of what any of it is or means or who I am, and can not really articulate anything. it’s ok. I am very accepting of the the reality of the disease but for some reason of all the holidays this one is the hardest when it comes to my mom. She loved any effort her kids made for her. She loved the attention. Anyway, I’m with you about celebrating other moms. I send cards to my aunt and sister in laws every year and that makes me feel really good. I try to get excited for all the mom’s out there which makes this day still a beautiful day for me despite feelings of loss and sadness.
I’m sorry you lost your mom so young. She’d be so happy that you are trying to carve out a happy life for yourself.
I blame Hallmark. Corralling all our emotions over a mother, father, SO, ect. into a day is so unfair. I would sign a petition to put these days to pasture in a heartbeat. Then celebrate on our terms. When the time is right. Part of my civil disobedience towards this is having my granddaughter make cards instead of buying them. FU card company lol.
those homemade cards mean much more
Rmb,.. I am sorry about your Mom too. You did your part so can feel good about that.
My Mom was the same way. I do think our Moms were (are) extra special in that they do seem to give so much yet are so appreciative and tickled with the smallest effort.
(It must be in the handbook. lol)
Glad you had a nice Sunday.