rotten husband vent
It's not Saturday, it's Friday. DS is wrong again.
Tim was on Fall Break from his classes last week, so he came here. I cooked, more than he deserves. Sweet and spicy black bean soup, chili, roast chicken, apple pie, Pear crisp, and so on … all homemade from scratch. I won’t be wasting my limited energies doing that again any time soon. Wear myself down to a mini crash state just to fix him what he wants …. For what???? And, hey, the less I cook, the more money I have.
While he was here, I asked him if he was going to go back to Maine. He said, “ No.”
Tim said he had several of essay papers to type up, so he went back to Eastern Kentucky right after church Sunday to do that. (I suppose he had some reason for not being able to type those papers here, where I’m sitting right now.) He called from a few miles away from college to let me know that he’d made it back Sunday night.
I didn’t hear anything else out of him until he called last night. The caller id showed my mil’s number, but when I answered, it was Tim on the other end of the phone. He was in Maine. He decided to leave college and go up there Thursday night. He didn’t bother to ask me if I wanted to go with him. He didn’t even call or email me to let me know that he was going. I’m sure either his mother or his sister pressured him into calling me and letting me know where he is.
Tim has told me in his emails, at least half a dozen times this semester, that, “I won’t be coming home this weekend. I have to take it easy on the old truck! It won’t last much longer.” He said that his old truck made it up there okay, but he didn’t know if it would make it back. I just snorted and said, “You may wind up hitchhiking.” Yeah, there's lots of weekends that he won't come home because he's afraid it will be too hard on his truck, but he can jump in that truck and drive it to Maine. The next time he says he's coming here for the weekend, I'm going to tell him, "Just keep your ass in Eastern Kentucky .... you've got to take it easy on that old truck."
He also said that he just called to let me know where he is, in case something happens and I need to reach him. As hurt and as angry as I am right now ……. If Hell freezes over and I fall through the ice, I wouldn’t call on him. I’m not going to answer the phone the next time he calls, either.
Oh, don’t worry. I’m not crying or breaking things. I’m perfectly calm …. but I am of a vindictive nature. I've put all the jewelry he's ever given me (including the wedding band, engagement ring, and diamond anniversary band) and the photos of the two of us in a box. I may break a few things the next time Tim’s here, unless of course I make plans to conveniently be somewhere else.
Tim was on Fall Break from his classes last week, so he came here. I cooked, more than he deserves. Sweet and spicy black bean soup, chili, roast chicken, apple pie, Pear crisp, and so on … all homemade from scratch. I won’t be wasting my limited energies doing that again any time soon. Wear myself down to a mini crash state just to fix him what he wants …. For what???? And, hey, the less I cook, the more money I have.
While he was here, I asked him if he was going to go back to Maine. He said, “ No.”
Tim said he had several of essay papers to type up, so he went back to Eastern Kentucky right after church Sunday to do that. (I suppose he had some reason for not being able to type those papers here, where I’m sitting right now.) He called from a few miles away from college to let me know that he’d made it back Sunday night.
I didn’t hear anything else out of him until he called last night. The caller id showed my mil’s number, but when I answered, it was Tim on the other end of the phone. He was in Maine. He decided to leave college and go up there Thursday night. He didn’t bother to ask me if I wanted to go with him. He didn’t even call or email me to let me know that he was going. I’m sure either his mother or his sister pressured him into calling me and letting me know where he is.
Tim has told me in his emails, at least half a dozen times this semester, that, “I won’t be coming home this weekend. I have to take it easy on the old truck! It won’t last much longer.” He said that his old truck made it up there okay, but he didn’t know if it would make it back. I just snorted and said, “You may wind up hitchhiking.” Yeah, there's lots of weekends that he won't come home because he's afraid it will be too hard on his truck, but he can jump in that truck and drive it to Maine. The next time he says he's coming here for the weekend, I'm going to tell him, "Just keep your ass in Eastern Kentucky .... you've got to take it easy on that old truck."
He also said that he just called to let me know where he is, in case something happens and I need to reach him. As hurt and as angry as I am right now ……. If Hell freezes over and I fall through the ice, I wouldn’t call on him. I’m not going to answer the phone the next time he calls, either.
Oh, don’t worry. I’m not crying or breaking things. I’m perfectly calm …. but I am of a vindictive nature. I've put all the jewelry he's ever given me (including the wedding band, engagement ring, and diamond anniversary band) and the photos of the two of us in a box. I may break a few things the next time Tim’s here, unless of course I make plans to conveniently be somewhere else.
Replies
Wow, what planet is this guy from? Since when do you go to Maine and not let your wife know before you leave? I mean, this stuff is Relationship 101. Has he always been like this? I agree that you shouldn\'t bust your butt to cook if it makes you sick. I do it, but my hubby appreciates it, and he understands if I don\'t cook because I was too sick to do it. Seriously, what is his deal? Does he want this relationship to end? Because he sure is acting like it. I\'ll be praying for you.
Allow me.....WHAT A JERK! Sorry if that was un-Christianlike!! But HELLO, what would you call HIS behavior? What\'s he learning in classes??? I believe a good servant of the King knows that that service begins at home. He should be doing everything he can to keep a happy marriage. It doesn\'t speak well for him that he is selfish and disrespectful of his wife. I can\'t see him in any other light!!! He is just rude!
I\'m sure you can hold your own, Nancy. But I\'m in total agreement with you putting away the \"us\" things around the house. He\'s not behaving like there is an \"us\" and a very serious conversation will probably have to be had in the very near future. YOU COUNT!!! xoxo
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!! xo
I can see you are hurting a lot and any wonder. You may be expressing anger towards him but his insensitive aloof behaviour is making you feel unloved and insignificant. You work so hard to be a good wife and then he just slaps you in the face. I feel upset for you dear Nancy.You deserve to be treated better.I know I have suggested this before, however my advice is to go on strike.He needs to become more aware of your value.Maybe now is not the right time because his mother is dying but line it up girl.He needs a wake up call.Hugs xo