Returning to just be here

I am now three years later down the road and reading my last few journals on here... a lot has changed over the past few years. Money still seems to be the issue. I am in a better place tho.. i moved from SC to Gettysburg PA, where I now live alone. I am adjusting to living alone, its not that bad. I do miss tho having someone around. The girl i was living with at the beach decided we should be friends. So we did and we are great friends now. She was sweet but really challenging to have a relationship with at times. So I have to remember all those times when she triggered me and I said, I need to live alone. 

I think actually her and I sort of healed some parts of us , deep parts. These parts could not be healed w out another person. So I am thankful for that. The relationship was more of a healing one vs a love relationship. 

I now work as a full time sub at a special needs school, it pays enough for me to pay bills. So i am happy. Im living right in a small town, and I kinda like the sound of traffic and trucks rolling by. I am also working of a book about healing. Its unlike anything anyone has ever written. 

Ive been trying to date.. and realize, being alone is good. 

Tonight i am sad, its dark, my car broke and I had to borrow money to pay for it. I am not happy about that, but I am happy I have someone I can get to help me during this time.