I have been fighting cancer for 51/2. After 51/2 yrs of fighting cancer Ive grown tired of all the side effects, pain, nausea,fatigue, of lab work, cts and everything else that goes along with cancer. I have been off treatment for 4 months but dont feel better than on the drugs. That makes me sad. I was anxious to see my ct scan off treatment, surprisingly was stable, no growth. my goal is to try to find some joy in life.