Responsibility

When I think about gambling, I have to accept that it is something I have to take total responsibility for. I used to blame my bf for getting me into it.....but he didn't force me.  He cajoled, tempted, and pressured me....but it was my decision to start gambling, and continue to gamble.  It was also my decision to quit. I feel a lot of resentment towards the casinos at times....but....then again....they didn't drag me in at gunpoint.  I do believe they know what they are doing, and that they do eveything they can to lure us in, keep us there, and they are merciless in their endless quest to take all they can from us.   They send us those freebies not as some sort of thankyou for previous business....it is to lure us in like bait in a trap, a worm on a hook.  They know once we take the bait... they've got us until we're empty...until next time.    That little casino cash voucher or free room just gets us started....and we can't stop.... we leave when everything is gone....and they end up with millions and millions and millions.....they end up with our houses, our businesses, our cars, our vacations, our time and financial support that should go to our families, our medical care, our savings, our secure retirements.  Gone to the coffers of the fatcats running the casinos. We lose our money, our security, our health, our families, our friends, our pride, our sanity, our freedom, and sometimes even our very lives. Then one day, when we've finally lost enough,  we decide it is time to make a change.  We come to places like daily strength, safe harbour, and gamblers anonymous.  We listen to what people  who are recovering say....and do whatever we have to do.    This is the beginning of building a new life in recovery! What I am finding is....the more I take responsibility.....the easier it is to recover.  I stop blaming others....I stop blaming circumstances.....and THEN I can turn my life around. Thanks to all the wonderful people here who continue to help me and stand by me on this journey!  Much love to everyone.....Dianne