Reptition
Koon tells me that my writing would be better if I dropped the repetition-I agree. My life is very repetitious however, every day feels the same-what I saw as a reassuring routine has now become a straitjacket. No room for anything new, and a solid dose of moaning keeps the sameness in view. At the top of my thoughts is the-How long can I bear to carry on with the same old same old? How can I break through the routine and bring new stuff in?
Yesterday at work I found it very hard to keep making calls-especially as they are having a verbatim drive. The questions are so pedantic you feel driven to edit them into a more concise form.
Even writing 300 words is suddenly a struggle-damn it! I have felt good for so long-from the 15th of september-even though Ive been mostly blue in the mornings-for the last week Id been feeling good in the morning too. How annoying it is to tumble from the mountain top and roll like a big snowball all the way back down again to Base Camp. There is no rhyme or reason to it. Just wake up feeling depressed after waking up feeling elated. It's so painful.
Nothing to look forward to either.
My foot is still very sore.
I need to pull myself together somehow. Keep it together till Christmas when I get about 12 days off. Then another year looms-I need to stay in the moment. This is not my best work, so best to stop here.
I feel depressed, my foot is hurting and my job feels like a life sentence.
Apart from that everything is fine.
Yesterday at work I found it very hard to keep making calls-especially as they are having a verbatim drive. The questions are so pedantic you feel driven to edit them into a more concise form.
Even writing 300 words is suddenly a struggle-damn it! I have felt good for so long-from the 15th of september-even though Ive been mostly blue in the mornings-for the last week Id been feeling good in the morning too. How annoying it is to tumble from the mountain top and roll like a big snowball all the way back down again to Base Camp. There is no rhyme or reason to it. Just wake up feeling depressed after waking up feeling elated. It's so painful.
Nothing to look forward to either.
My foot is still very sore.
I need to pull myself together somehow. Keep it together till Christmas when I get about 12 days off. Then another year looms-I need to stay in the moment. This is not my best work, so best to stop here.
I feel depressed, my foot is hurting and my job feels like a life sentence.
Apart from that everything is fine.
Replies
Sometimes life is an endurance contest, isn\'t it? I hope the gloom would disappear for you again soon. Depression puts a pallor over everything we do. Can\'t attack depressions \"head on.\" Do something to forget about it. Get absorbed in something you really like to do. Time and circumstance permitting that is. Try to keep the same structure for a while; sometimes doing the routine will carry you from the Land of Sad to the Land of Glad.
Life realy is a marathon and not a sprint...good days and bad days. For some reason i have been melancholy and I don\'t know why. My health generally has not been so bad of late but I feel ...as you say......rolling down the mountain...
keep on doing your best, Dinah........
a good friend that is down is still giving me hope withe the words she has written i find sun shine in lines on the page. joe