remorse

Remorse is a wonderful teacher. My issue has been lying. Little stupid lies that matter not but break the truth barrier. I know this habit began as a young child to gain approval and became a normal thought process for me. I have been working to break this habit for months and understand the why to some degree. I stumbled and am picking myself up again. I feel such remorse for the dishonor I have done. I know I cannot change the past. I do have the power for the future. It has been suggested that the work I have done makes this stumble feel so much harder; that I know the difference so clearly and the act of telling a lie now hurts me more. I think this is true. I do not understand the motivation when I do understand the difference between right and wrong. I am working to forgive myself and to diminish the deep sense of shame I feel. I so want to be that authentic whole hearted person and know this is within my grasp. Today is day two of joining Daily Strength. I plan to check in for the next 88 days in a row if at all possible to re-inforce my behavior and focus my attention on this issue. May my spirits continue to guide me toward light truth and love.