Realizations

Sending everyone away helped me, how do I know because they came back today, and I began to feel miserable. So now I have to go or they have to go. Either way I don't care because I am tired of hurting, and being hurt by the people I love. I have to remember to ask my doctor why do I fall soooo hard when  a monkey wrench has been thrown in my day, or way. Why can't it just roll off. Like my mother told me, "you better take your feelings and walk on them". That was her apology to me, some apology huh,. But I wish I could walk on them instead of holding on to them. I am so glad I started back writing in my Daily Strength journal, I would make posts on Facebook, nothing like what we share here, and at my class reunion a childhood friend said she was glad to see me, but would I please stop making all of those depressing posts. I was taken aback, but I just laughed it off. I was like am I really that bad. After that I really threw myself into my room and blocked everyone out because I felt like I am bringing everyone down. But it is okay at this stage in my life if it doesn't make me happy, make me better, or make me money, I don't make time for it.