Ramblings
So I am reading journals for all you lovely ladies, I'm just not responding to most of them. I'm still struggling to figure out my own path. Just know that I'm always thinking of you all and praying for your happiness, health and BFPs for those who have not gotten one yet.
I am still pissed about my RE, and after talking to a few people, I know I'm not alone in being pissed at him.
I am doing a spin class every Friday morning now, today was my 3rd time going and it's getting a bit easier, but it's still hard to do.
I've promised the classmate that I did the boot camp with that I'll work out with her on Wednesday mornings and Friday mornings along with going to the spin class with her.
My DH came home the other day and seemed down. I asked him what was wrong and he just said that he was upset by the RE and how upset it had made me. He also apologized for being so distant lately regarding all of this IF junk. He admitted that pretty much every person he works with has recently announced a pregnancy or birth of a child. One girl even told him that she'd just found out she was pregnant after an IVF treatment. That gave him hope, but hurt at the same time.
His exact statement about distancing himself was that he needs "to distance myself from all of this or else going to work would just kill me." That broke my heart, knowing that it's causing him just as much pain as it is for me.
Why does IF have to fuck with us?
Oh, btw, today is CD73 and is officially the longest I've ever been without a period. I told my DH that I don't want to take the Provera and Letrozole until January at the earliest. His response was to tell me that if I don't have a period by cd73, I should go to my GP and demand an u/s to see what the hell is going on.
Well, I'll be calling on Monday as it's too late to call now, to set up an appointment with my GP. My mum keeps going "maybe you are preggers!" and keeps going on about it. So, I stopped telling her about things. I just can't stand her enthusiasm and excitement. I also don't want her to be hurt when it all results in it just being a cyst or some other problem.
I am still pissed about my RE, and after talking to a few people, I know I'm not alone in being pissed at him.
I am doing a spin class every Friday morning now, today was my 3rd time going and it's getting a bit easier, but it's still hard to do.
I've promised the classmate that I did the boot camp with that I'll work out with her on Wednesday mornings and Friday mornings along with going to the spin class with her.
My DH came home the other day and seemed down. I asked him what was wrong and he just said that he was upset by the RE and how upset it had made me. He also apologized for being so distant lately regarding all of this IF junk. He admitted that pretty much every person he works with has recently announced a pregnancy or birth of a child. One girl even told him that she'd just found out she was pregnant after an IVF treatment. That gave him hope, but hurt at the same time.
His exact statement about distancing himself was that he needs "to distance myself from all of this or else going to work would just kill me." That broke my heart, knowing that it's causing him just as much pain as it is for me.
Why does IF have to fuck with us?
Oh, btw, today is CD73 and is officially the longest I've ever been without a period. I told my DH that I don't want to take the Provera and Letrozole until January at the earliest. His response was to tell me that if I don't have a period by cd73, I should go to my GP and demand an u/s to see what the hell is going on.
Well, I'll be calling on Monday as it's too late to call now, to set up an appointment with my GP. My mum keeps going "maybe you are preggers!" and keeps going on about it. So, I stopped telling her about things. I just can't stand her enthusiasm and excitement. I also don't want her to be hurt when it all results in it just being a cyst or some other problem.
Replies
Sorry this sucks so bad. Treat yourself to something fabulous this weekend. Thinking about you!
I\'m so sorry things are hard right now. I truly hope the new year brings you nothing but joy.
Good for you for doing the spin class, work it girl! Sorry infertility is a giant ball of shit and that you have to go through it and big hugs to your hubby, it is so easy to forget that they go through this shit too! Hey have you ever tried juicing, like the Reboot with Joe kind of juicing? I did a week long juice fast and lost 12 lbs, but more importantly it changed the way I eat for the better, just a thought! Hang in there hon, the new year is on it\'s way!! XO