Rain funky Rain Pain...
Day three is here..it's cool and wet...dang old sun aint come out yet.........my fibro aint mellow...these joints all ache...gosh darn i don't know how much i can take.......i feel so alone in my pain, prayin I can keep my big grumpy mouth shut.I'm always grumpy at times.. but when it rains i say mean things .It's like a war in my mind..anger, loneliness, and frustrations all three goin at it ....A great cloud of dust.. sparks flyin, chunks of rocks and debree from the fray.twirl about my mind like a dark twister up rootin my feilds of thought...layin wasite to my hard work to maintain a moral respectable me.........I hide more in my room...memories of my abusive childhood spark up the flames of anger....I battle with the emotions and wonder Why....why must I relive this terrible memories over and over.... year after year.... the pain remains as fresh as the first time...the mean abusive slander still rings in my deaf ears....it was all my fault....it is still all my fault...........I feel so alone, unneeded miss understood... neglected and forgotten...my soul hungers for a mate to complete this life...I gotta go....hide in my room... and pray for the sun..........Oh looky a break in the clouds.... of doubt... a ray of Son is shining thru...Russ
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